Ok this might be a bit jumbled and long, but please bare (sp??) with me, we need !!!

Ok so....where to start? Well, I have put htis here because I would rather use gentle methods than any kind of crying or ignoring techniques, but at the moment, DH and I are starting to get a bit desperate.

Alright, well lets just say that I haven't had a full nights sleep in over 2 1/2yrs....and I haven't had any less than 2 wakings in more than 14mths. I am tired, DH is tired. We are both over the sleeping issues in our house and are going to try to do something about it, but don't really have any kind of plan.

Some of the issues we want to address are.....
We live in a 2br unit, which most likely won't be changing anytime soon. DS sleeps in our room full time. He sleeps in his cot in our room part time, then come into my bed. DD goes to sleep in her big girl bed, then comes into our room part way through the night. DH sleeps on a double mattress on the floor in our room most of the time. He sleeps in our bed if DS isn't in it, or if DD isn't in on the mattress with him. DS will wake 1-2 times a night for a bf, then dummy. DD will wake 1-2 times a night for a drink, her blankie or dummy. At least. DH deals with DD, I deal with DS.

When DH is on a night shift it is inevitable that I end up being up at least 4-5 times cause both the kids want to have me sleep with them but when I move from one to the other they both wake up and cry. They don't seem to really wake each other except in the morning. I hate nightshifts with a passion because I end up being sooooo much more tired than I usually am. The other night I was awake 7 times within 6hrs. Can anyone say ZOMBIE....

So this arrangement isn't working for us any more. DH and I get very little time to be together. Intimacy is rare in our house. I know it isn't just for the bedroom, but at the moment, that's about the only place we can seem to manage and it is likely to happen without too much effort. At least in bed we can just snuggle and touch each other. We are both sooo tired too.

DH's job isn't easy. He needs sleep. He works 12hr+ shifts he works full time. I work part time, usually about 40ish hours a fortnight. I am not coping emotionally with the lack of sleep. He lets me sleep in often, but then he misses out. And I feel guilty. The kids are fine and seem to have enough sleep. THey are happy and energetic when they wake. Unlike me who is often snappy and grumpy. I also fall asleep on the couch in the mornings and I just so don't feel like I'm being the mum I want to be at all. I also don't feel like DH's and my relationship is getting anywhere. Not that it is deteriorating or anything, but there's just no time for us. I sooo miss just 'us'.

So, after all of that, the plan is at chrissy time when both DH and I have 2 weeks off together we are going to try to get the kids into their own beds full time. In the same bedroom. And to take the dummies away because we think that might be contributing to the wakings sometimes. And to night wean DS. At this time, we will be able to support each other in doing it. We had thought to just do it all cold turkey. They go into their beds with no dummies or booby at night and that's just that. But as it gets nearer, I am starting to stress about it. I know DD will have a really tough time with it. Especially the no dummy. And DS will definately protest big time about no boo through the night.

So does anyone have any wonderful suggestions?? I am starting to really get stressed about it, cause I really do want my bed back, my hubby back and some more sleep, but I'm not sure what extent I will be able to go to?!!?? Please help me!

Sorry this is so long and thanks to anyone who has actually read and understood any of it!