Im so sorry you are having such a rough time of it. I personally wouldnt be listening to anyone saying she is wrapping you around her little finger, shes a baby for goodness sake, and a very young one. I tend to block out anyone saying how well their babies sleep too...its never been helpful to me. Ive always breastfed and had them wake every few hours while doing so..and have questioned why so many people seem to base their level of baby 'goodness' on how they sleep. I find it particularly distressing that it can be setting up parents (especially first time ones) to feel exactly as you are now. After making sure that she isnt upset for as Auorora has already mentioned, could you look at settling baby with you and then leaving her in the room. I always found Sammy settled really well if i leave him in our bed. We put the cot sidecar style onto our bed so during the night I could move him over if I needed to. Of course its not practical for you to be going to bed at 7 but will she stay sleeping if you leave her once she is asleep? Alternatively can your DH try to settle her?

I wish you all the best...you have certainly done nothing wrong. Our little ones dont come with handbooks so we just have to listen to our instincts and do the best we can

Jo