oh my you guys have had a hard run, i know what its like to be in the postion of almost loosing your other half, I lost my fiancee when I was only 19, and the horrible part was that I was the person there to witness his work bike accident and tried to revive him ahd him going until the ambos got there then he passed on all of his throat was pretty much crushed from the bike landing on him, you are very lucky to have each other - big hugs for you, but I can only imagine what you went through on his recovery journey also. I since have found my second true love which was my best friend who just so happened to get me UTD first before I realised I had any sort of feelings for him lol. Now we're married 2 sort of healthy kids, we dont get much sleep atm keep waking to check on Ryley in particular with his breathing troubles cause he just stops breathing in the middle of the night, but he sleeps right beside mummy every night and I cant remember the last time DH and I slept in the same bed.

But I guess all in all theres no real reason why life dishes out the hard yards for some and golden platters for others, its just the way life goes, and in reality you either crumble with it, or let it make you stronger and a better person for dealing with it in the right way. Sometimes I just get fed up with it all its one thing after the next, and really with all the rest of lifes normal problems going wrong like crashing cars, bills, and whatever else, you cant put a price on how valuable health is its the most worrying thing of all to the point where you are worrying yourself sick about your loved ones, but we as mummys have to stay strong for everyone, cause like Lisa said to me yesterday a happy mum makes a happy home! If you start to worry or show it more than what you should everyone else will too and its our job to try and keep everyone else strong. Arent mums a wonderful thing?

Im sorry to hear about your terrible time of late too, but like you said we never know whats going to happen, and when you've hit rock bottom with everything in your life it can only get better cant it? And its not whats happening thats bad in your life, its how you deal with is what makes you perceive it in the way you do, luckily I have had a positive attitude most the time with it all, even though sometimes I feel like Ive had enough.

I am too so glad I have this forum to vent in there are so many of you just like myself, and I cant vent to my family, cause it only makes them worry and they need a happy mummy right now.

good luck for TTC#3

we dont know if im pregnant or not yet waiting for my period, if i didnt get preggers in this cycle i will do a little resting from it all for a bit maybe until things blow over with the kids, have to wait and see wont we