Young single female considering sperm donation

[dreamrise659]

Hi Laura,
I'm single and currently pregnant through IVF. I did the home insemination thing with a known donor for a year before going to IVF (which took a year as well). I'm 37 so time was definately starting to get against me but I'm happy to chat if you want to know more about the process and just how to help get yourself to feel okay with the decision to go it alone.

Lori

[Curlygirly]

Hi SubiGirl,

I totally understand your need and want for a child but cos you ask for opinions here is mine. I am not in your boots and I am not at all judging you and in the end of the day it is absolutely your decision but.....I think it couldn't hurt to wait. I am not saying forever but perhaps a year or more. Mr Right or the right partner to share this massive and wonderful responsiblity could just be around the corner. Yes you are young but so is 30, 35, 38....I do not question the love you would have for your little one but the decisions you make now will affect your future and to share this with a supportive and wonderful partner could just be one more year away I applaud all women who do this for themselves and be the sole parent voluntarily and others not always voluntarily but sometimes the most important question you need to ask is " Am i doing this for the absolute right reasons and will this be the best outcome for my child physically, mentally and emotionally?." Good luck with your decisions and keep exploring your options.x

[*Ash*]

Laura1981,

the OP says 'any thoughts, opinions or advice would be much appreciated'.

[Curlygirly]

Laura, I have an opinion and as much right as you. Maybe there is no partner around now but who says she can't share this with a partner any time soon. Wow no need to be so aggressive and defensive.....I made it clear I was not here to judge anyone. And by the way...I was single once too so I know how it feels to want something bad no matter what age and situation but I have life experience and know I found it easier to have a family with my partner so was just sharing my opinion which the thread was suggesting!

[*Ash*]

yes but its not appreciated for people to tell me or any other woman to wait because they don't have a clue what its like to suffering with this situation especially when theres no partner around.

Laura, I think it's fine for you to say that you don't want someone telling YOU to wait, but curlygirly was addressing the OP. She was not directly addressing you. I believe it is unfair of you to criticise her contribution when she was merely providing her opinion- which is what the OP asked for.

[LizLemon]

The simple fact is that deciding to have a child affects both you and the child, and it is a good idea to consider all the factors and whether or not it will be the best option for both. One of my best friends had a child through this method and while she knew it would be a tough slog, I don't think she had any idea of the complex issues that would come about once the child was born. If some of the ladies on this forum are here to offer some advice from either a two-parent or single parent standpoint, then it certainly can't hurt to take on all that advice prior to making the biggest decision you will ever make. It is not judgement, it is simply offering a different perspective.

[Phteven]

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