M2T - I know I should just do what I feel is best and stick to my guns, but he is trowing compromising into the topic and I have to bend, just as he does. I totally agree that at 14 months they don't know the difference and that it becomes "seriouser" when they go to school.

Mummymeg - We agree that we don't want to learn her that they are bad ppl, heavens no! And just because they are a different colour does not mean that they have to be treated different, it's just when it comes to mixing, kwim?? I think he fears that she will bring home a boyfriend of colour. I'll be a widow that day.

Lauren - I just had to laugh at the segregated schools. We have a "state" in South Africa called Oranja. It's and all-white boerevolk state (they even have their own currency ) and they have only-white schools and when DH is in a real testy mood, he will say that he will be sending dd there for schooling. I know that will never happen, because I will not let her go to a hostel and I am DEFINATLY not moving to god-forsakend Oranja!!!! But you are right, there are no all-white, or all-coloured schools anymore, so the sooner she learns to intergrate, the better for her.

So after another heated discussion, we went "day-care" shopping today and found the most perfect place, colourfull and fun looking, big back-yard with trees and grass and lots of toys. It's not all white, they are open to all races, but there more white kids. And less kids overall, so more one-on-one attention, and hopefully less flu-germs. So that was our compromise. I told him, I'll move her there. Problem is ... they are full We can be on the waiting list for next year and that is not going to help us now. The owner is on holiday now, but as soon as she comes back, DH is going to talk to her and hear if there might just be a chance that she can help us.

Thank you all for your replies. I know I know all these stuff, I was just at my wits-end with DH. He really can be a stubborn @ss sometimes.