goooooood thread and something i have spent much time pondering lately too Ianna.

I agree with ROuges first post, it is EXACTLY what i believe.

With XH I used to be so dependant on him that I would panic without him and the thought of him ever dying would keep me awake at night casue i thought i couln't possible live without him. GOsh how scarily unhealthy that was!

I have been really seriously F'd around by XH for some time now so right atm I have no desire to be in another relationship for at least a couple of years. BUT, I really do so look forward to start dating again at some stage in the future when i am strong and successful in my own right. I look forward to experiencing those lusty feelings again. And cause I only got to have 1 of the 3 babies i wanted to have I feel like I hope to have those babies with a wonderful guy some day. But by the same token, the thought of lettinga man into my life again does kinda fill me with dread, but i think thats cause im right int he thick of a messy X situation right now.

atm i have a F buddy. We only call on each other every few weeks and a lot of the time i turn him down cause i have DS with me. But I do so enjoy having that closeness with a male now and again. It is a bit of fun and i know it will never go further than Fbuddies cause he is so NOT what i would look for in a partner and he feels the same way about me, so knowing that there is no feling there is great, no confusion. However, I dont know that i will continue with the F buddy for the reason that I feel i should be strong enough and secure enough to be able to be without male attention for a couple of years while i soul search and build myself up. So i am just hoping that he doesnt put him self up on offer to me on a night when im feeling 'weak'

We definately dont need men. The only thing I need men for is to give DS a male influence (my Dad does a brilliant job of that). Hey, i pay for my lawns and garden to be maintained each fortnight, and she is a woman I dont need a man for that!

Wihtout a man i do miss sex, but i wonder if really i miss the male attention and confidence boost. if that is the case i have plenty more growing to do before i can even entertain the thought of letting another man into my life.

I do sometimes imagine my future and when i do, I imagine buying my own house by myself with my own money, travelling the world with friends, I dont ever imagine being married again....

blah blah blah!! LOL Ianna you really got me thinking with this one!