I've been contemplating this dilemma all afternoon.
I think it could be quite hurtful to tell a parent you weren't coming to their child's party becasue it was at Maccas. But you shouldn't go if you feel that strongly... I think...maybe..

I am trying to live in a way that my children will understand my ethical standpoint and hopefully that will in some way shape theirs, but its not as easy as it sounds. My Aunty kept her kids away from TV, fast food and sweets and while most of my cousins have followed suit and grow thier own veges, live ethical, healthy lives, the youngest went totally nuts when she was old enough, over indulging in all those things forbidden in her childhood. My kids have had McDonalds a hand full of times, and I explain its food that you can only eat sometimes, but mostly try not to make a big deal of it either way. I am trying to work out how to teach them about healthy, ethical choices rather than not giving them a choice.

The other side of the coin is how it feels when you realise someone is judging, especially if your choice has been a considered one.

I recently asked a parent from the local Steiner School, half jokingly, if we would be outcast because we have chosen (a much thought about choice) to have TV and to let our kids watch non commercial channels fairly frequently (average 1-2 hours/day). I received a lecture on why we shouldn't have a TV. It was awful, I felt defensive, misunderstood and angry. I knew the argument, I had considered it, I had made a choice and felt like it wasn't being respected at all. We will not be going to that school who has a very patronising paragraph on their home web page about how the majority of their parents have made the choive to forego TV in the home in keeping with Steiner philosophy and their childrens best interests or something similar. That's why I thought I'd ask if it was for real.

If someone refused to come to my kids party because I had TV in the house or something similar I would be reluctant to ask that person to another 'do'. If they don't think its an issue they may just feel you are being snooty, if they have thought about it and still decided on that venue, it might cut to the core.

I am with you on an ethical level, but on a relationship with others level, and whether keeping your kids away would be beneficial I am gettiing a sore crotch from all my fence sitting. Interesting question though...