That really sucks, I think if the only issue is discomfort/antipathy for his daughter then he's immature and still freaking out about being a father. Especially if he missed a month of being around for her. If he's lovely and wonderful in every other way, then maybe he just needs time. It's impossible to take care of a baby or a child and not eventually feel some sort of bond or closeness, so despite his snide remarks go ahead and have him hold her anyway. Men (women too really) use nasty remarks to hide behind, and to create distance, and to cover up nervousness.. As long as he's not hurting her, then too bad he can hold her for ten minutes or *gasp* give her a bottle. Won't hurt either of them.

I guess the line is if there are other issues besides this one, or if he IS hurting her or you, well then that's a huge problem. But if he's just freaking out and too immature to tell you he's freaked out he'll get over it, especially since he's got a supportive loving partner and a gorgeous baby.