I have been in your shoes, trust me i have posted on BB more than a few times upset/frustrated and at my wits end with how my relationship was, i admit at first i didn't like what was being said to me, to me NOBODY understood what it was like so i would become defensive and started defending him and this was before we were wanting children!. I fell pregnant with my DD when we were seperated (we were seperated for a few months but started a casual thing), i sat him down and specifically told him i expected NOTHING from him, i wanted the baby and was happy to do it on my own. But he made it clear he wanted to be a family. Our relationship was great while i was pregnant, he was fantastic for a few months after she was born especially when i had PND then over time he changed, he was nastier we fought more. But this time it was around our DD. I took it, i was like you i didnt want my DD to be from a broken home, i accepted (most the time) the way he treated me and was convinced this would be my life forever.

Eventually i snapped, came onto BB (once again) needing advice, being told very similar things to you about leaving and not all men are pigs, i was scared and once again i ignored everything that was said to me. It happened time and time again. Then one day it was different. I was sick of crying all the time. I didn't want a broken home for my DD, but i also didnt want the upbringing i had. So i started looking at ways to get out. I called centrelink, i contacted crisis accomodation, talked to friends and my mum. I was serious. Then i don't know why, but during a fight i told DP my plans and it was the wake up call he needed, we sat down talked for HOURS and HOURS since then he has been MUCH MUCH better. We hardly ever bicker or argue. Of course i have my moments where he just absolutely rubs me the wrong way but we are able to communicate once i calm down and talk about it. Plus any arguing we do is NEVER done in front of our DD, if i feel one coming i will either say no we aren't doing this or i pull him aside.

I'm saying this because my DP was willing to change (after realising how serious i was about not being treated the way i was) and has changed. You need to stand up for yourself and your unborn baby and decide if this is the life you want. It doesn't have to be hard, a relationship takes both people to work at it. I'm in no way saying my life is perfect but everyday things get a little easier and i am much happier.

Good luck, i do hope it all works out well for you whatever you decide to do.