Definitely compromise. His wishes are as important as yours.

The ttc and m/c side of things... My own experience is when ttc goes longer than expected people start to say the 'wrong' things.. As in you can become sensitive to talk about when the next baby is happening. And with m/c, I'm glad only a few friends knew of my pg and then m/c. I would have hated people who had heard of the pg but not the m/c to have inadvertently said something about the pregnancy. It's upsetting for everyone. I've been that person who asked if the morning sickness has eased up and if they found out what sex it is only to hear they'd lost it months ago. Unfortunately she wasn't a petite lady so I really thought it was baby bump I'm quite open with the fact I had a m/c, so that's not a secret, but even telling those few who knew about the pg was enough.

So keeping things quiet for a while can be a protection, and I think if your dh feels he needs to protect himself a bit from the unforeseen, then it's only fair to compromise.

We kept ttc quiet to a few close friends and bb. And we usually keep pg quiet til some sort of scan, for us it's a viability/dating scan around 8 weeks. I haven't gone the whole 12 weeks