Just as he shouldn't be dictated to either or 'made' to tell/not tell and has to live with his decisions.

*shrug*
no, he shouldn't be dictated to either. But at the end of the day, a decision has to be made. And I know personally, as the one who suffers extreme morning sickness, as the one who would have to 'lie' and 'cover up' the pregnancy, 'I' believe that my choice will be the deciding choice if all negotiations fail. Not everyone is the same as me, and they would give up this decision to their partner, even if they disagree vehemently.

Ideally, you could reach a compromise you were both happy with. Or one of you may feel more strongely then the other, and thus you (or they) may be wiling to set aside their own feeling for their partner's stance - but that in itself is a CHOICE. If you are deadlocked and cann't reach agreement, choices need to be made, and I think in that situation, the person carrying the baby does have the greater say.

Thankfully, I have never had disagreement on this topic with my DH, he couldn't keep a secret to save his life. But if we ever did, and we couldn't reach agreement or compromise; then yes, I get Veto.