bec - i so think you are married to my DP - he is exactly the same & the more i say or suggest things he does the opposite (just to **** me off i think) some days i think i would be better off living by myself back near my family but then i dont want to take having her dad around away from my DD - i know exactly what you are saying but unfortunately have no answers as to why they are like this - it just gets so frustrating!!