Sisters

[Inertia]

I think you will find out that that is fairly normal.

She definitely did not want to hurt you else she would have said to to your face. But that doesnt change the fact that she does feel that way. My sisters and I are easily caught into this trap as well. Its just another form of keyhole judging, only we have a window sized space to look through - still doesnt show us everything.

Also not living a day in their shoes can cause us to feel morally superior.

Turn it around on her. Find out what is driving her comments and explain to her any underlying issues that she is completely unaware of and look at it as constructive criticism - that maybe from the outside she is seeing something you missed. Sometimes I have to point out to my DH when he is being inconsistent with the kids and we dont tend to notice sometimes.

Certainly if you do not want to open your house to be judged and ridiculed in email, don't invite her back, but she does love you and is probably extremely upset she did it now seeing how you found out.

Our sisters were the first people we ever had to compete with - and its hard to shake that.

[Kailani]

Oh that's so nasty I'm sorry your sister said such hurtful things. I can see what Inertia is saying as well and I would maybe agree if it were only one or 2 hurtful comments that sort of had some truth to them, or if there had been some sort of incident that made her say those things in the heat of the moment, but the fact that she was saying these things to your other sister over a series of emails, and made several nasty comments, that would put me off and I would definitely not have her back at my house if that's how she feels! No values, bad parenting, kids are brats, husband is rude...! No way she would be welcome back if I were you. But that's just me...I have no time for nasty two-faced people.

And by the way, they sound like things my sister would say, hence I keep my distance.

[widdly]

Didi - that is exactly what has been happening with me and my sister, nothingis as hurtful i knowxx

Now my sister wants to make peace with me, but its hard knowing that she thinks my son is a complete monster and brat and she has such a low opinion of my DH

[Dotti8]

I am one of four sisters (one of the middle ones). There is 18 months between 1 and 2, then 2.5 years between 2 and 3 (me) and 4 years between me and no.4.

We were all close growing up. I got especially close with my younger sister when the elder two were off at uni and I was finishing up highschool. Then I went to the same uni as my older sis' and it was further great bonding time!

Yep we fought growing up but not grudge holding fights, just your usual 'throwing the hair brush at each other' kind of fights.

The three eldest all now live in Brisbane within 2kms of each other (same and adjoining suburbs). This was a gradual thing. My youngest sis went to uni here in Bris. I moved up after finishing uni, then 6 months later sis no.1 moved up, then 12 months later sis no.3 moved up!

Now sis no.4 has moved back to NSW for the easy coastal life and I miss her terribly!

They are definitely my best friends. We all now have children ranging from 5 years to 4.5 months (my DD). I am sure they will all be close as well!

(Much to DH's dismay ) I would love to have four daughters so that they experience the kind of love and friendships I had growing up!!

[shellbell3]

Oh that is very upsetting.
My sister and I are very close so if she ever said anything like that I know I would be devastated. Other people can say crap and I'd be like whatever but so much more hurtful from your sister.
Did she say why she said it? Were you close prior to this?

[didispunk]

Yup we were close,
I have no idea why they would have said such things. I though things were totally fine, her in my house me accomodating.. driving them here there and everywhere.. and getting up to her 6 month old at 2am.. THAT IS WAHT SISTERS DO.. well I guess I was wrong.

now my sis is going to delete me from MSN Facebook etc... she is now turning it around on me somehow...
So shallow.. and so hurtful to me..

What am i ment to do?

[danniellabella]

My sister and I get along way better as adults than we did as kids. We don't figt much any more and now I do like to think of her as a friend. We are similar but still very different. I think we would spend a lot more time together if we lived closer together.

I'm her sister and :yeahthat:

[didispunk]

Well I guess mine are not that acoomodating or caring.. more hurtful then anything at the moment.

[Crystalwings]

I have 3 sisters and we have a very close knit family. We have family bbq's often, live within an hr of eachother and although we do ***** about eachother we know eachother so well that it doesn't really matter iykwim? we all know that we ***** about eachother but I don't think any of us really care about being judged by those we love cause we have been through so much together. I don't neccessarily think we would be best friends if we weren't sisters but we are because we are sisters.
We did fight during our teenage years but don't all siblings? We lived in close proximity to eachother in a 3bdm house with my parents so ahd to learn to get along to some degree. When we rebelled we usually had someone else in the house to cover for us or they were going throught the same thing.
We are all very different and go through stages of being close to one sister or another. I wouldn't want it any other way. What can I say I adore my sisters even if we have had our ups and downs.
It has given me a greater understanding of living with girls and was soooo happy to have a daughter first just so I knew I would have a daughter. I would love a boy next time but would also love Olive to have the experience of having a sister.

Didi I really hope that you can work things out with your sisters. Is there someone who can be a mediator for you so you can work out the issues you have?
Best of luck