Hi,

I know there are some of you here who understand the family court and child custody. My question isn't really for myself but for my x (complex situation I know).

Ok here is the situation:
Ex's wife left him when there son was 16mths old for someone she had been having an affair with. During this time X has had joint custody of the child (now 8.5) and usually 1 week on 1 week off.
The child has diagnosed ADHD, Asperger Syndrome and Epilepsy.
The mother has no time for him, buys him no clothing or shoes (my x does all of that) nor pay the school fees.
Over the past years her new partner had been doing the large majority of the child care/raising of x's son. They have now seperated as she has had an affair with one of his friends.
OK... currently my xdf has his son every wednesday night, most tuesday nights and every second Friday to Thursday... so on average 8 nights a fortnight.
His son has now stated repeatedly that he is 'moving' out of his mum's home to live with his dad and he doesn't want to live with her anymore.
His mother has a daily marijuana habit, drinks every night and is still fobbing her son off to her x (not xdf but the man she left him for) or my xdp more than she has him herself.
When at her house he rarely leaves his room, he stays in there and watches dvds or plays the playstation alone.
She is emotionally abusive to him.
Her new x (plus other people) would be prepared to suuport J (my x) in a custody battle. The problem in all honesty is finance.

OK so here are my questions:

1. How much would it cost to go for sole custody? (they currently have no custody court orders, just a mutual agreement)

2. Can the child say what he wants in regards to his living arrangements or is he too young?

3. What would the likely hood of winning custody be? (would it be worth putting the child through a court case)

Anyone who can advise me in any way would be greatly appreciated. As stated I am nolonger in a relationship with my XDF but our seperation is very ammicable and we are actually better friends now than before the split. There is some slight chance of a reconciliation although to be honest his son is a contributing factor to our split. That said I know he doesn't like living with his mother and loves his father so I would support that for his sake.

ok thanks any advice greatly appreciated, oh i think i have said that.