Can I bag out other sites??

[Lulu]

It's also hard when one book, one author or one website (not this one!) decides there is ONE way to go and stubbornly sticks to it. Follow the rules and you will get this outcome.....just follow the RULES.

I wish they would all have the foresight to say "if this technique is not working for you or is upsetting for you, maybe you can try something else".....etc. But of course they dont, because "they" want to have the answer and make a lotta $$$

[BellyBelly]

You've hit the nail on the head there Lulu - much more money in - 'make your baby sleep from 7 to 7' than, 'here's a few things that could help your baby sleep'....

[paradise lost]

It's funny isn't it how much more willing people are to pay for something with contravenes all common sense (like a creature (i.e. a newborn) with a stomach the size of a walnut going 12 hours without food being healthy/normal/good!) than just accept reality!? Modern life and the removal of the "nasty" truths from in front of our eyes has ALOT to answer for!

Bx

[Astrid]

It's also hard when one book, one author or one website (not this one!) decides there is ONE way to go and stubbornly sticks to it. Follow the rules and you will get this outcome.....just follow the RULES.

True, especially when the advice ignores other factors, such as possible illness, food intolerances, allergies etc To me it is cruel not to eliminate those factors first. As adults we would not insist on making ourselves go to sleep with a tummy ache, so why do some people think we should do it to our babies?

[Phteven]

https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...d-mothers.html

I think we need to remember that there's a fine line between bagging out other sites and bagging out other Mums

[Willow]

I think we need to remember that there's a fine line between bagging out other sites and bagging out other Mums

[meow]

I wasn't bagging out other Mums... the thought didn't even cross my mind when I started this.

I'm obviously still too fragile for all this at the moment.

[Bathsheba]

Interesting thread.

Generally, when i seek advice I am more likley to heed it if the person giving it, or the "expert" prefaces it with "trust your OWN instincts but you might like to try.....". I think the thing that is missing in some other sites is the reinforcing of the message that we need to and can trust our instincts when it comes to being mothers and parents. I examine advice and think to myself: "is this aimed at helping the parent or the child?" Which way is it weighted? To me a lot of advice these days leans toward improving the convenience-factor for the parent. Just a general observation. Regarding the eye-contact thing: great posts Hoobley I agree that what is right for a newborn is not necessarily right for an adult and visa versa. I tend to settle my babies in dark quiet rooms while BF or with their heads snuggled up into the curve of my neck or in bed with me or wearing them in a carrier. In those positions it's not easy to make eye contact anyhow. If my baby is crying then I often hold them close with them against my shoulder... patting their backs and rocking... with them facing the other way... not conducive to eye contact. I don't deliberatley avoid it... but it doesn't come naturally for me to follow their gaze during settling times... mainly because it's too dark! But that's just me. And all i'd suggest is to just do what feels right. Sure read advice and take on board what you think might help... but at the end of the day I think, you're more likely to have success if you trust in your own intuition. Children, especially babies, pick up on a sense of confidence within you... if you cultivate that then that alone will be soothing.

[Phteven]

Ren, I wasn't suggesting that you were trying to bag out other Mums and I know that you only posted with the best of intentions.
I only posted in a pre-empive way. There was no agenda or sub-text in my post; I just wanted to remind everyone that it's easy to slip over the line from dissing the people who hand out the crazy to advice to dissing the Mums who follow it. I did so in the hopes that no-one would go there not to suggest that anyone was doing so already.