How do I deal with this behaviour?

[MantaRay]

Astrid hun, there is something in the air. My 3yo is going through a "difficult phase" too. I can highly recommend Pinky's latest book, Toddler Tactics. It is helping me to understand the behaviour and find different ways to deal with it. Honestly, 3 seems to be so much worse than 2! Big hugs to you, I know it's not easy.

[Astrid]

Less than 4 weeks to go Rayray! Toddler Tactics did arrive the other day. I was reading it in the toilet (the only place I can read), she came in, grabbed it off me, gave me an Essence to read instead and ran away with it Wonder if she was trying to tell me something?

[MantaRay]

PMSL Astrid, that is too precious!!

[xtml]

great thread everyone... oooo i can hardly wait till Olly hits 3, i thought i knew at last how to handle 2yo horror behaviour (on a good day i can handle it). i loved reading all your different strategies. these tactics have gotta be better than my neighbour's who screams at her 3 yo daughter "pick it up! what's wrong with you, are you stupid?" - i can hear it from my place with the door shut. and it doesn't work. maybe nothing works on her child, but if she ignored it/ asked for a cuddle instead, at least it wouldn't be causing more tension. good work mums!

[Nai]

Oh Astrid - I am pretty sure that we have the same daughter DD has started this sort of behaviour and from what you have said it looks like it is only going to get worse! I might have to get my hands on that book.

[Astrid]

Oh dear, nice to know I am not alone in this. Poor thing though has gone through so many changes this past 6 months, so that could be affecting her, but a part of me thinks she would be behaving like this anyway I was warned that 3's was worse than 2's, but I just didn't want to believe it. I am not entirely sure if it is that worse, more that it is just different, so a different way of handling things needs to be thought of again. Oh well, the joy of parenting.

[Astrid]

I just give up. Thought I would do the right thing and try to spend some one on one time with DD this morning. Took her to the local park after dropping DH off at work. Not the best times as everything was wet, so we walked around the lake looking at the ducks and then across the road to the beach where she could watch some horses being taken for a trot. Kind of killed me with my instable pelvis, but I kept on going for as long as I could before getting her back to the park. She was able to have a play this time. I was getting tired and hungry so decided it was time to go. Gave her lots of warning and explained it was so we could have some food. Well she tantrumed again, she wanted icecream and to stay. Ended up having to walk off on her and then tell her that if she did not come with me that there would be no swimming with daddy later. So she came to the car and then ran away screaming. She knows never to run away in the car park, so I was furious at her, thankfully it was a quiet morning and safety was not that much of an issue.

It just makes me wonder why I bother, I do something for her and it just ends in screaming and tears. I just can't win