Unsolicited advice and criticism - what you want to say or have said

[Ginger]

i know, i really shouldn't be lying about it.
people are constantly asking me about breastfeeding ds now that i'm pg again, as though i'm hurting the unborn baby or something by breastfeeding him- or like it's weird to see a pg woman breastfeeding.
i like your suggestion lulu of children being toasty- my ds is so toasty and smells so fresh in the morning, i lovewaking up with him. much nicer than smelly old dp

[Smoke Jaguar]

Rainforest, you can lie about it if you're uncomfortable about the attention! There'll always be someone like me to take up the slack I've been hanging around booby feeders too long - I cannot understand any non-positive attitude to BFing whilst pg, or tandem feeding!

[Macca79]

A friend of mine practices attachment parenting and told us a story the other week about her response to a nosy inquiry into her parenting choices. Not sure what the initiating question was but she responded with a polite "Oh thank you, let me know when your book comes out so you can tell people you at least sold one copy". Had us all giggling.

[Erin_25]

I heard a great one the other day "why don't you look in your own backyard before you look over the fence"....ha,ha loved it.

As for the hair cut - the other day it was "oh Erin, get the poor childs hair cut"that's the third time it was topic of conversation at playgroup...far out. I like his wild, ferral blonde mop LOL.

[Karina]

Are you still breastfeeding?? Umm yeah..why wouldnt I be? (with a look on my face as if to say it was the most absurd question anyone had ever asked me.)

Same goes for using cloth nappies, not control crying and so on.

To the ones who push it further, I just pull some intereeting information out of my bum, like the WHO recommends to breastfeed till 2 years old... or some other such little tidbit of information. After that I usually fet some stupid response usually not anything more than an "oh .. ok" and a quick subject change.

[smiles4u]

I get big time, more times than I care to remember .... " Don't you think your daughter would like a little sibling " or " Are you still trying for another baby "

For geez sake I had my daughter at 40 ... and the moment she turned '2' I am expected to fall pregnant at 42 (& a half) in an instant ... a damn miracle I'm meant to do and do it 'again ' OMG ... isn't one miracle clearly enough ??? ... If people knew my story they would know it took us 2.5yrs to concieve & before then we had gone through our hearts been ripped out with a m/c

We have been trying to fall pregnant with no#2 for 14mths now & it's hard enough as it is to deal with all the heartbreaking emotions that go with it & as time goes & my reproduction system getting older ... it just eats me up. At my age trying to fall pregnant let alone be reminded with these Questions from strangers or friends feels like hell some days

I ran into one of four Mothers from my old Mother's Group that are pregnant with their 2nd bub a few months ago & she said to DP & i " We need to get a move on with another baby & catch up with them all seeing they are all pregnant ". How can someone who is pregnant say this to someone else fully well knowing they are in their 40's. Need I say they are all younger than I ... & for all she knew I could have been trying to fall pregnant longer then them all.

Well, they have 'all' had their 2nd babies & given their 1st child a sibling ... and here I am still trying & still scared by that comment ...

People, especially pregnant women need to be more mindful as you just don't know another woman's situation

[Liviam]

OMG smiles!!! I could have posted exactly the same thing. My infertility isn't age related it's PCOS.
I need some tips on handling the when is the next one coming question. At the moment I'm using the "we want to enjoy Olivia for now" but no idea how much longer I can keep saying that. I would love to tell them to f@*k off and mind their own business but that might be a little bit blunt, LOL! It hasn't gotten so bad that this week I've spent the week in tears and laying in bed.
(sorry Mayannes for hijacking. Hope you don't mind.)

[Astrid]

When an old high school friend was over visiting, she and her cousin were really at me with the sleep questions "how often does she wake, what time etc" I just smiled and said "Look, I don't know and I don't have a problem. I cosleep, so it is no effort for me to feed her. I don't worry about sleep when they are young".

If I am questioned about co-sleeping I just tend to comment that I am too lazy to get up for feeds. If they don't know I co-sleep and ask how many times I get up in the night, I just say "Oh, I don't get up", generally they looked shocked and think I just leave bubs to cry. Then I continue "I don't need to get up, we co-sleep, I just roll over "

I did get nasty once, I had a GP (not my normal one) refused to give me a referral for depression. She believed I should control cry, as she did with her son and he is fine, that should solve my depression. Well I let loose "I believe it is a form of child abuse and I will not abuse my child!"