Gosh, i thought this was a general chatter thread about homebirth, is it now going to turn into another debate about how homebirth is potentially unsafe!? There are many obstacles to homebirth, or indeed any birth the way the WOMAN want it, and Tegan said perhaps she needed more reassurance, rather than a debate.

Tegan you can email me off board if you like? Then you can get to know me better and you can easily know me nearly-IRL (i'm in the UK so vists might be harder ) before bubs is born. I have never had a hospital birth, but i have been present at one (my SIL's) which was a long induction/posterior baby/traumatic delivery so i have seen to some extent how frightening these things can be.

The way we birth should be about how we WANT to birth - yes, many homebirthers have to overcome fear, but it is not hard because they feel strongly about it. I DID NOT WANT to go to hospital unless medically necessary. The system you're working with, having to find an independant midwife, having to pay $$$ for it, conspire to make homebirth seem different/abnormal and make you feel bad and that maybe you should do the normal thing and go to hospital (i sympathise there - as much as it is supported in the uk, only 1% of babies are actually born at home here). But your desire to birth out of the hospital setting is NOT abnormal, the system which doesn't comprehend and support this desire is the abnormal thing. Most animals want to feel safe and secure to birth, it is a competely normal desire.

So if you find when the time comes to pay $$ you are still very unsure that homebirth is for you, that's ok, maybe it ISN'T for you. I have a friend who had an elective c-section because of the way her time was scheduled (she felt waiting for a natural birth was out of the question) and i would NEVER contemplate that, but how can i judge her? She did what she felt was right at the time - that is all our children can ask of us, and all we should demand of ourselves. You do what you feel is right, and know you did your best. Yeah, sure, it could go wrong, but hindsight is 20/20 in EVERY situation. Personally knowing womens bodies work just fine (and having IRL friend's who'd homebirthed years before i fell PG) i knew that homebirth was the safest option for a long time before giving birth and i can't tell you how many horrible hospital birth stories i hear when i can pinpoint the things that happened that drove it all off course.

You will know nearer the time, further on in your research what you might want to risk and what you might not want to risk. If you decide homebirth isn't for you that's great - we have to know what we want in order to get it.

Bec