Homebirth General Discussion #10

[HotI]

Babies Arrived

Jennifer13- Baby GIRL born at home 4th January

Bella29- Baby GIRL born at home 10th January

HotI - Baby BOY born at home 21st January

*Ash*- Baby BOY born at home 14th February

loulabelle - Baby BOY born at home 24th February

Cricket - Baby GIRL born at home 15th May

...Em - Baby BOY born at home 7th June




Babies On Their Way



chocorama - May

BellyBelly - August

phynna - August

Tanya - August

Ambersky - September

lady_neon - September

Cassius - November

mirriumu - November

pumpkinzulu - December

turtlejane - January

Sara - February

Ree*Ree - March

Aimz - March

[HotI]

Does/has anyone else ever felt like people are more excited to see the baby than support you?

Yeah, i went hermit in the last week. Just hanging with DH and DD. Was easier to avoid people, and then they didn't annoy me.

I was really glad that DD was home, but also really glad she was asleep. I read her a book and breastfed her when labour had started, and thankfully she went to sleep and i could do my thing. She woke up a few hours after baby was born and wandered out for a little but then went back to bed. We had a few back up plans in case it wasn't working having her at home.

[Tanya]

Huge congrats and welcome to you both, Aimz and Ree

I will be having a house full at this birth. For DS it was just us, kids and partner (which is a lot anyway ), but this time I have decided to have two wise women here, one is a doula/hypnobirth instructor/birthing from within educator and the other is a very trusted friend. I also have a birth photographer, my brood of 5 and the dad all the adults are respectful of birth space so although there will be many people here I believe they will not invade my space. One of my friends will be bringing entertainment for the kids, last time they got restless and I recall them continually asking when the baby was coming or rocking on the sides of the birth pool which was very distracting. I also would like some extra encouragement to slow down 2nd stage. My 2nd stages are far too quick (like a minute).

Must add that I was in discussions with the same IM for my birth, em and she was discouraging of birth photography for my birth as well. But I am glad you got some good images anyway If I had've employed the IM I still would have had the photographer, felt it was something I really wanted to capture. Although my eldest took photos last time, I think having a professional will be better, it will free my daughter up to help me more.

Kell, I hope you start to feel better very quickly

Xx

[Jennifer13]

My doula more overlapped with what most ppl expect of their partner than the IM. She was a friend and supported me physically, massage, hands on, bringing me things, used to my home and space, implicitly 'with me' more in the moment, ITMS. Also had her own VBAC and understood my beliefs, mindset and how much the birth meant to me emotionally. DP had never attended a natural birth before, has not researched birth and frankly believes it is sacred women's business that he is happy to provide support for and equally happy to witness, but is not his domain as such.

Kelly, sounds like those pre-birth emotions are in full force.

[Aimz]

I'm a little stressed about something. We are moving at the end of the year which is great as I'll get to search for a home that I love, and also one that I feel comfortable birthing in.

The suburb DP keeps coming back to is a good 45-60 minute drive from my midwives. And that makes me nervous. I've been looking at suburbs not too far from them (and our families) but DP thinks we need a BIG house etc. so difficult!

How far away are your midwives from your home? Is 45-60mins too far?

[HotI]

My midwife was about an hour away. For some of our appts, i met her at my Mum's which was closer. She made it to the birth, just! Ths was a second birth though, so a bit quicker. I also had my student midwife who was 10 mins drive away.

My student midwife kinda acted as a doula.

[BellyBelly]

As long as your midwife doesnt have a problem, its not. My IM lives in Melbourne, I moved to country Victoria and am 1.5hrs from the city, a little less from her place. I trust my body, I know it wont all happen in an hour or hour and a half, and if it does, DP has instructions on how to catch lol. Hospital is only 5 mins away too, but I would much rather her be here than hospital 'just in case'

[Cassius2]

My midwives in good traffic live a good hour away. bad traffic and the meter is counting lol. i had a quick second birth (2.5 hours) and they were able to get there for the last 45 minutes (which was the important end anyway lol) before she was born (and then of course hung around for a few hours afterwards etc etc).

[Jennifer13]

Both my midwives were at least an hour away. I didn't think it'd be a problem and the first arrived in plenty of time, just as my labour was 'established'. Second nearly didn't make it. If there's ever a third time I'd have both come straight away. If it wasn't for the fact that pushing took 50 mins this time I'd have only ended up with one at the birth.

My doula was only 15 mins away.

First baby especially, an hour is fine.

[lady_neon]

Welcome Aimz & Ree

At my birth: midwife, back-up midwife & student. DH of course, mum, and if I'm in labour for long and DH/mum are tiring and needing a rest, we may call DH's sister just to relieve them for a sleep/whatever is needed. Circus I know but it will just be DH & I till for first stage, then we'll call midwife. Will call mum when DH starts to tire, and the student will come when for shortest time poss (ie when midwife thinks birth is around half hour away). Basically just keeping options open. Mum, and SIL if she comes will be asked to leave the room when baby is being born.

As for where midwife lives - I actually don't know but I am on a midwifery program (CMWA) so they do allocate you to be close (within half hour I believe). The student is 10 minutes away.

8 weeks to go! Still haven't hired pool. Must sort that out tomorrow!!

[Aimz]

Visited the Mercy FBC last night for a tour and to book in. This is our Plan B if we decide not to go with home birth. In all honesty it looked fine, midwives were all gorgeous and I'm happy to do all my antenatal care and classes through them. But the big turn off is the policy against water birth. So home birth is definitely preference one for both of us. I love how worded up DP is on home birth now. He asked heaps of questions and outlined to them why it was a silly policy. They agreed with him but it is still a hospital at the end of the day.

Really great experience to go and find out how it all works though!

[Ree*Ree]

Thanks so much for the warm welcome everyone!
I'm glad i'm not alone in feeling that the reaction from my FS was apalling. I definitely want to make a formal complaint, even though my Mum and DH think I'm overreacting and should just let it go. One of the clinic's nurses rang me today to ask why I hadn't been in yet for my weekly bloods (I just couldn't make it on Monday so will go tomorrow, promise ) and I asked her what the complaints procedure is. She gave me her email and will pass on my written complaint to the head Doctor, and the head Dr will then write me back. So now, to compose the letter. Any suggestions? I'm assuming I should not make it too emotive, and just explain the situation, and how unacceptable I found his reaction to be.

Aimz the no water birth option at the FBC sucks! Your DP sounds awesome though

lady_neon I am also hoping to birth through the CMWA, really need to finish my application and send it in! When did you find out that you were accepted, and when was your first appt?

I am starting to feel a bit nervous about opting out of the 12 week NT scan. The stubborn and confident part of my head says that there is absolutely nothing to worry about, and to just wait until the 18 week morph scan. The insecure part of my head worries that something bad will happen between now and then, and it will be missed... I should just suck it up and be strong!

At my birth I'm thinking that midwives, DH and doula is enough. Maybe my Mum, maybe not. Might be good to have her there to be DS' support?

[PumpkinZulu]

Ree, my midwife recommends someone aside from yourself and DH be there to support any kids that will be present in the house if they need it. We'll have our doula there, and if DD really needs someone more familiar, we have my mum as a backup to either come and be with DD here, or take DD to her place...but we're hoping that won't be necessary.

[Jennifer13]

My DP wanted to be DD's support person, but I had my Mum here so we had an extra. DP understood that he couldn't be there for DD should an emergency arise, so understood the need for a back up.

[BellyBelly]

Children definitely need their own dedicated support person. My kids have my partners mum here for them.

Ree, with the complaint, cc the health commissioner (I have her mobile number ) and it makes health organisations take you seriously and act fast. Thats how I got the hospital dramas sorted out here Doctors and hospitals need to know that behaviour like that is not acceptable and womens choices are to be respected. The more women complain about how they're treated wanting a human right of a choice, the more the issue will come to attention and action taken (even media).

[HotI]

Kelly, do you know if there is a time limit to registering a complaint with the health commissioner?

[BellyBelly]

I'm not sure sorry, I think if its in recent years you should be able to? I havent kept the paperwork I have gotten from them but I should have. I will see what I can dig up, lots has been put away, cleared or culled for the upcoming birth.

[Jennifer13]

Sad to see a long term Homebirth midwife up before the HCCC tomorrow. She'll be unable to deliver babies at home for two years if their complaint is upheld. Heavens knows we already have a HB m/w shortage in Sydney.