The mrs, it sounds like you have already answered your own question.

Afm, I had dd there for dd2's birth. But she wasn't in the room. She was just down the hall. She would have been fine tho, but maybe distracting in the final moments. I'm not sure. I had a friend act as a support for her, and she took her next door for a bath and played with her and answered her questions. I think you need someone devoted just to the kids when/if they are gonna attend a birth. To help them and also make sure that they arnt getting disruptive. Also to just remove them if the mamma needs that to be.

Yesterday we watched dd2's birth and dd was fine, but dd2 had tears in her eyes and would start to sob when she saw me in pain and or if I was crying with joy. She didn't understand at all. She is def more sensitive than her sister. It maybe that dd stays with me for the next birth and dd2 goes to stay with the neighbors for a little while. We have pretty good neighbors who are really kind to our kids. I am sure they would help out and allow us to keep the kids close but not so close that they are scared.