Tegam- it is such a nice feeling isn't it. I am trying to enjoy it as much as I can.
Had a birth planning meeting today. Everyone came and it was lovely to see everyone.
Mw had a feel of my babies position. I wondered how low he is, cos people are commenting that I have "dropped". Anyway Mw couldn't palate the babies head in the pelvis, cos he is so deep down. She thinks she can just feel his shoulder at the brim. So looks like this baby is locked and loaded. I still don't think I will have him till he is 40 weeks, but then third babies like to be cheeky don't they. That being said neither me or my mother or sister have had a baby born before 40 weeks so far, in ten pregnancies between us, so I don't imagine this will change.
Wow bella you must be uncomfy! Third babies are tricky, my per labour was long and tiring with DS! And they say 4th babies are like your first again = true for me.
Oh um ok if you like. We talked about roles and what I wanted done. Some stuff was technical in case of a transfer. Because my kids doula is an emergency nurse, she would be with me, dh and Mw helping me or baby and photographer would call 000, that sorta thing.
Went over where I will set up birth space so photographer could look at lighting in the room and what I am happy with. We talked about simple things like getting someone to come thru and pick up dirty clothes if they are on the floor if I or hubby haven't done it. Just cos I know it will drive me bonkers! Lol! And I don't want a mess in all of the photos videos and I can just imagine the commentary going on in my mind when labouring if I can see it there but am not able to come out of labour land to deal with it.
We talked about silly stuff like how I wanna put up my hair lol! My Mw joking that she never thinks of what she wears but since my last video was shown at loads of conferences, she 'might' slap some makeup on if their is time. Silly stuff I know, but we are women and so lots of silly, vain stuff in-dispersed between the serious discussions.
We talked about what authority my transfer plans give my Mw in advocating for my baby, should I not be able to actively participate in decision making and baby care if I am unconscious.
We discussed my eldest daughters participation and making sure that everyone understands that I want her in the room if she is coping with my labour etc
After the others went we just had a normal antenatal appointment and she checked baby and listened to me talk about my fears and pains. I am quite sore and having to take a fair bit of panadiene to keep functioning. But I know it is all part of the process and I don't want to wish it away because it hurts. So taking the pain killers allows me to get some sleep and keep smiling. I will see her again in ten days. She saw me about four days early this week instead of next Tuesday because she forgot to leave the birth pool last week at my mother blessing, so to get back on track for weekly appointments we will stretch it out a little.
There you go Tegam, loads more than you wanted to know. I'm feeling very loved and supported by my community. My hubby is doting on me too and we went out for dinner last night. He is off from when I am 41 weeks, but won't do any oncall shifts from when I am 40 weeks to make sure if I go on time he isn't making it hard on rostering for his colleagues. And now we just keep getting ready.
Oh bella, sounds beautiful! What a great support network you have! If your video has been watched at conferences is there a way we can see it? I've been watching heaps of YouTube births and get so frustrated at the mess around the house! I end up having a rant to one of the support people just sitting there.... 'ah couldn't you just pick that up for thè mumma' hehe I just haven't thought much about the birth yet.... Still month away thankfully
My birth preparations were quite casual*, so its lovely to hear more details of your meeting. I would want to make sure the clothes etc were picked up too! I see all the beautiful birth vids, and i wonder if other people's houses are always like that, or if they were running around in early labour cleaning up the kids' mess from that day. It makes me feel better that their is some planning in getting the vids and pics gorgeous.
I planned what to wear etc this time because i wanted some photos, but unfortunately the photos didn't work ;( Person taking photos thought flash was annoying baby so turned it off so all photos are black. i would have put lights on or whatever to get at least one or two nice photos.
* not quite the right word, but can't think of how to explain it.
Tegam if you go to YouTube and google madel e l i e n e s B i r th you should see it come up. It is by G r e g arious P each. It is a hbac birth and it is in black and white. Make sure you have tissues tho yes? And hot1 I am gonna have fairy lights for illumination. So even if there isn't heaps of light, there will be some. I bought some ages ago, that have little paper lanterns on them that are cute. And my photographer is really skilled at getting good photos in low light. Oh and tegam, make sure you down load it in the hd version, cos it looks a lot better
And yeah it was pretty causal really. I mean we talked about lotsa things, but really mostly we just chatted around things. Nothing is set in stone. One of the great things about having the same team is that they already get me, we just talked a bit about logistics etc.
Yes that's me Georgia did a beautiful edit. She has a real knack for documenting the way it is all about family. And she was beautifully respectful of my space. My Mw was surprised at some of the shots she managed to get, as she was unaware of her in the room.
Georgia is coming again as long as I don't birth on the 31st of may as she is racing down and back to Melbourne for a photo shoot with her baby. We will have a replacement photographer if that happens. I'm ok with it even if it isn't ideal.
Ohhhh bella talk about the suspense now, I'm going to hold off watching until I can watch on the big computer in HD and have a good cry! I can't wait.
Hoti I get the *casual comment but it not being the right word **** not sure how to to describe my other births but this probably best fits. I'm trying to think about planning more this time but just draw a blank.... Too early maybe?
Have NEVER had a photo taken of me in labour, I ask DH if he could please take photos and some video this time and he said 'no way, as if you'd want that' and I said' we'll actually I really do, and I change it to - you will take photos and some video this time it's important to me' he said 'oh ok' so fingers crossed. I've never had a 2nd midwife at a birth in fact my midwife didnt make it to my Homebirth but do they take photos for you if you ask them, I want a total hands off and NO ONE talk to me when I'm birthing so couldn't they take photos?
I think that they can take photos and will if you ask and they don't feel like as if it will interrupt their first priority which is focusing on you and the baby. You probably need to have a talk about them with it. And or look around for someone who you could invite as a silent observer who could photograph. Some photographers who are just starting out in birth photography, are willing to do it cheaper whilst they get some photos in their portfolio. Or just a friend you could trust in the space.... I def think that even if your mw's say that they want to concentrate when you are pushing baby out, they could either take some when you are labouring or remind your dh to take some. If I didn't have a photographer, I would write it down everywhere to remind my dh to do it.
It's not sitting well in my mind having a Mw in the room when I birth (or outside as I hope) so the thought of second Mw and a friend or photographer, no way. But a Mw there in the background taking a photo, feeling like the focus is off her in a birthing sense.... I don't know if I'm making sense. Anyway I'm sure DH understands now how important just a few photos mean to me.
At my last birth my secondary MW took some photos- she enjoys it so she was more than happy to do it. She took photos right through the actual birth while my primary MW was focussing on me. We had a student MW who took some video for us too so they were both the paparazzi in the room and I didn't have a clue until I after the birth and I was holding DS2 in the pool still and I noticed the camera at one point then.
DYING to watch your video when I have a moment Bella!!! I'd love to find a professional photographer this time. Just not sure if it's appropriate for us as we're trying to limit the amount of people there so as not to overwhelm my DS1 and give him the space to be part of the birth. Fingers crossed. I think I found a post-natal doula who does birth photography and we want to hire a post-natal doula this time so she could be perfect.
Im looking forward to watching some great birth vids, so have put yours on my list bella. But will have to wait until im alone and can get right involved.
Im the opposite with birth photography... i didnt have anyone with Spock, and cant see me having anyone with Quark. For me it is a private peraonal thing i dont want to show anyone. Its just between me and my baby and select couple of people i let in. But thats my personal.choice and my views. And some people do get some amazing images
TT I don't think I'd show anyone my photos. I just want them for me but boy like you I am SO glad that people get photos and videos and share them. Wow I love a good birth photo
And yes totally agree I have no plans to have anyone extra at the birth that's for sure. Sneaking outside and popping a baby out with no one knowing is my plan whether I tell my midwife this or not is yet to be seen
Bella your meeting sounds great. I have mine in the next couple of weeks. I am looking forward to the pool being dropped off and really being able to set up my birth space. I can't believe how low your little man is, mine has just engaged which I wasn't expecting. I can't wait to see photographs from your little mans arrival.
Being a photographer myself I will most definitely be having a photographer their to capture everything. I have also had 2 lots of maternity photos done and plan to do a couple myself this week.
There will be quite the audience for my birth lol, I have 2 MW's, a student MW, my hubby and 2 kids, a support person for the kids and my photographer. Thankfully the room I am birthing in has a door and I am fine with asking people to leave if I need too. I think it also helps that I know everyone personally and feel like I have a lot of support from each of them.
Yeah I find that even with people there, everyone knows not to hover. Last time I think my photographer was in the room for all of 20 mins tops. There certainly wasn't much more than that of footage. And I totally get why you girls want to privacy. I didn't even really know if I wanted a photographer there last time... I was offered by my photographer, as I was one of the first in her portfolio and we are friends. The only thing that allowed me to say yes to her, was the fact that we were friends and I knew she 'got birth'. There was no flash photography at all, and no interuptions. She was like a doula in the space, but with a camera in her hand.
Bella your meeting sounds lovely. I had lots of photos taken last time, my Doula took them and so did my mum and to be honest I didn't notice anyone with a camera only after bubs was born. I love my birth photos and I got through them often with my boys. I definitely want photos this time too but we are not having a doula this time so I'll need to sort something out with my midwife although my mum will be here again too.
I've had my 20 wk scan...and found out the gender....I'm ecstatic to say we are having a little lady!!! I am beyond excited and I still can't really believe it. After two crazy loud boys I can't wait for a little girl!!
Re: Homebirth General Discussion #20
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