Yeah I don't think dh loves the chaos. In fact I am not so sure I love chaos either tbh, but I do enjoy the challenge of being more organised as we have more kids. I am so torn. We had a really hard two weeks of school holidays with a really bad bronchitis/cold, and so it was enough to bring dh and I to squabbling, and I am sensitive every time he shows he isn't coping, cos it makes me feel like my dreamed of fourth child is getting further away... . That said, we won't make decisions now. Bu to can't help worrying at it, like a dog with a bone.