I understand the idea about birthing at home, even if bub will die. In many ways that's quite an attractive option, as we can do things our own way. There's no way DH could live in a house where our child has died and I'm not sure I could either. The hospital were extremely good to us when DS died, giving us time and peace. They lack the facilities like a comfortable double bed in a private room, which is one of the things I want them to work on. Despite my anxiety about hospitals, we were treated very well. They looked after us and DS with respect. If bub is going to die, there's no reason for them to be poked and prodded. Last time, they didn't know what was wrong, so they tried to save him. But I do see the attraction of having bub at home and letting them go peacefully in my arms.
Hopefully it won't come to that. I'm going to cross that bridge if we have to. TBH, part of me just wants to stick my head in the sand and sing NAH NAH NAH until it all goes away. Meanwhile, I had a shocking day today with DH going away for work, rehashing a bunch of things relating to DS's birth and death in counselling and rising anxiety because I hadn't felt bub move in a couple of days. I came home early as I wasn't productive, stuffed myself with chocolate and had a nap. The nap helped calm me down and the chocolate seems to have given bub a rush and there's been more movement. So feeling lots better
Jen - we have the same MW we used last time. The need for continuity of care really influenced me wanting a HB this time as well. She knows our history, knows how I birth (apparently I could birth in a tree) and she has an emotional investment in us, DS and this little wiggle monster. Our care is between out MW and our GP, with unofficial backup from the OB who oversaw things at the hospital. We did some OB shopping and it was DH who felt he wasn't comfortable with them. We really dont feel comfortable with strangers. And you just can't beat appointments in your living room on a Sunday morning for convenience
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