Homebirth General Discussion #5

**Tegam** · May 13th, 2011, 08:05 AM

Happy birthing lady bug!

Hello everyone and belly rubs to those mummas cooking their bubs!!!

**Jennifer13** · May 13th, 2011, 08:42 AM

GL to all of you with impending HBs. Especially thinking of you Liz, fx for a few extra weeks this time.

You can put me down for a Jan HB. I may as well start as I intend to go on!

**brogeybear** · May 13th, 2011, 08:51 AM

Add me too please. Sometime in November I assume. Still don't have definite birth support, should get onto that. Wanting to know if there is just one or if there are two babes hiding in there. Hopefully I'll know within a few weeks, as I'll want an extra person if there are two babes.

**LionsandBears** · May 13th, 2011, 10:40 AM

Add me to October (all going well). Our other options are closing, yay

I'd tried to book the Monash birth centre as a compromise for DH but I'm outside their zone. I can book them as a homebirth backup. I did with DS just in case, as they're closer than RWH. I get anxious going to RWH, so I'm hoping to avoid that. Actually, I'm hoping to avoid a transfer altogether this time. I've told bub to grow healthy enough by 37/38 weeks and then s/he can slip out in the bath about then and save us the stress. 25 sept is a good date from a numerological POV.

Eta - i havent told DH or our IM this yet, but I'm leaning towards a lotus birth.

**brogeybear** · May 13th, 2011, 10:45 AM

We will be lotus birthing too Tash.

**Tegam** · May 13th, 2011, 10:46 AM

Eta - i havent told DH or our IM this yet, but I'm leaning towards a lotus birth.

I have never done a lotus birth but would be happy to make a bag for you

**Bella29** · May 13th, 2011, 01:08 PM

I'll be hb'ing in Jan too so you can add me to the list

we won't find out the sex

**LionsandBears** · May 15th, 2011, 01:44 PM

I have never done a lotus birth but would be happy to make a bag for you

That is so sweet. Thank you. I'm not sure when I'll bring it up for discussion. We want to get through the 2nd trimester first, as it's possible DS's genetic condition could be picked up quite late via u/s. It's hard to plan when we don't know if bub is OK or not. I can only assume s/he is and go from there.

**~Stoked~** · May 15th, 2011, 07:37 PM

Tash, I can't imagine how hard that must be. I found it hard enough to start believing I was actually having a baby after having 4 miscarriages but, after what you went through... God, I just cannot fathom that feeling. Big, big hugs. I have absolutely everything crossed for a healthy baby for you this time x

**Eenee** · May 16th, 2011, 02:23 PM

Tash you are incredibly strong! But we are all here for you. I really hope this bub is ok.

**Lady-bug** · May 18th, 2011, 08:20 AM

Tashybabe-Sounds like you've got a great plan worked out. I am amazed by your strenght

Thanks for asking about me. All is ready to go, although bubs seems very comfy in there and doesn't appear to want to make a grand entrance anytime soon. Had a shocking nights sleep (brain was in over-drive) so really hoping nothing starts today as I will be super tired

Who else is close? PumpkinZulu??

**onthefly** · May 18th, 2011, 09:37 AM

We used our front room, as it's a bit cosier, and left the kitchen/dining area for the midwives to have their tea

I made a lot of noise and I was sure neighbours must have heard me, but nobody's ever mentioned it, though one of my neighbours did get worried about the ambulance turning up. Never mind about the old dears

**Tegam** · May 16th, 2011, 04:49 PM

Tash, I can't imagine how hard that must be. I found it hard enough to start believing I was actually having a baby after having 4 miscarriages but, after what you went through... God, I just cannot fathom that feeling. Big, big hugs. I have absolutely everything crossed for a healthy baby for you this time x

So well said!

Tash i know i was borderline kookoo being pregnant will Molly! You are doing a great job!

**Tegam** · May 16th, 2011, 04:49 PM

26weeks stoked! WOOHOO!

**LionsandBears** · May 16th, 2011, 07:24 PM

Thanks ladies. DS died from a genetic condition we knew nothing about. The 12 and 20 week scans showed all to be normal. In many cases, a CVS or amnio could be done in subsequent pregnancies to test the baby for the same condition. In our case, that's not possible. The only way something can be detected is in detailed ultrasounds. I've read a bit about it and it's possible the same condition might not be picked up until 32 weeks. I hope in our case, that nothing is shown and that baby is healthy. Anyway, that's why there's no "safe" time for me. However, I will assume if ultrasounds at 34-36 weeks show bub to be OK, that's because sh/he is. If not, we birth in hospital and we say goodbye to another baby.

It's not something I like to dwell on, TBH. It is what it is and we can't change it. Meanwhile, I started feeling little taps every day last week, which is early compared to DS. Of course, I haven't felt anything today. There's always something to worry about. I'm trying to train myself not to - it doesn't do me any good.

I suppose, this is one reason why I so want a homebirth. We have so much else to worry about. I dont want to relive the trauma of going to hospital. I dont feel safe in hospitals. For me, that's where people die. Birthing in hospital will just add so many more layers of post traumatic stress, I'm scared my own memories, fear and anxiety will mean a stalled labour and all the medicalised nonsense that could mean. Strangers freak us both out (this is a normal part of grief). We can't have strangers in our house, let alone walking in on our birthing space. The thought of someone taking my baby away from me again sends me into such a state of fear and grief.

I just want to stay home, where I'm safe, with people I know well, who I can be comfortable with. And birth our baby in peace, then crawl into our own bed for snuggles and not come out until we're ready.

Of course, if at any time we need medical attention, then we're not shy about transferring. We did before for a good reason, we'll do it again if we have to. But I want to make sure we've got good birth plans agreed in time. Last time, DS came before we'd had a chance to write the birth plan and we made it up as we went.

Sorry about the novel

**onthefly** · May 16th, 2011, 07:51 PM

Tashy I'm sure there will be many watching over you and holding your hand in cyberspace. If only the well wishes and hopes of so many could ensure everything goes as it should

How lovely to feel your baby tapping away inside you

**Cassius2** · May 17th, 2011, 03:42 PM

If not, we birth in hospital and we say goodbye to another baby.

this might sound really strange and not well thought out, but if bubba does have the same condition, do you have to have them in hossy? i'm just thinking outta the box here because my mate who had a baby with severe breathing complications was born at home (they didnt know about his congenital issues) and the thing that stuck in my mind was that the mum said it was the best birth journey she could of given him as it was peaceful, quiet and respectful ITMS.
also...not sure (total brainstorm moment from someone with a PTSD and fear of birth wards

) if baby does have the same thing as baby L could you still bring them home? i know that it sounds weird, but maybe that could be a good way to run from the hossy and spend quiet time with your people?

just a thought...and you dont need to answer to this at all...total brainstorm

Stoked: omg, not long for you either! wow, once that 27 weeks is past it all just seems to hit fast forward for me

**Jennifer13** · May 17th, 2011, 06:43 AM

Tash. If only there was more that could be done.

for a great u/s outcome at 34 wks.

Have you chosen a m/w yet?

thread: Homebirth General Discussion #5

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