Demand Feeding

[katanya]

Now as much as I think it's wonderful your DH is so pro breastfeeding, it is ultimately you that needs to be the feeder and the one convinced that you wnat to do it..if you are only doing it because it is "the right thing or your DH wants it" then it will make things very hard for you if you run into difficulties in the early days..

I am really gald you are interested n the breastfeeding classes..they are just an amazing idea!

On the subject of DH's having a supportive one is a MUST have..as the first few months don't have too much expectations of cooking melas too much..tell him that's his job for the fisrt few months (tend to be the babies witching hour when they want to feed non stop! ) It does settle down though and you can actually do things again! I just treated breatsfeeding like my job for the first few months and put my feet up and baby on..DP cooked the meals..it was great!

[Liz]

hehe... great idea DH has already been pretty good. Up until the last couple of weeks I've been totally unmotivated when it comes to preparing food, and cleaning up, and he's been soooooo good. He actually appreciates a clean kitchen now and insists its done each night! hehe.

I am definitely pro breastfeeding, a little nervous I guess, as I'm not looking forward to sore nipples etc etc. I just hope I don't feel the pressure if I find it too hard. I think DH will be understanding tho if we run into problems. But we definitely want to give it a good go. I told him about the classes this morning, and he's happy for us to go. So when I organise other classes thru the hospital, I'll organise that one too.

[beckles]

katanya i really like your relaxed attitude to breastfeeding it is such a breath of fresh air

I just treated breatsfeeding like my job for the first few months and put my feet up and baby on.

well done
love beckles

[katanya]

LOL..thanks Beckles...well it's all about your frame of mind I guess, I was really lucky to have a trouble free first few months..of course my boy has certainly made up for that now with his health issues ..

Ivana, I thought like you when I was pregnant, I REALLy wanted to d it but I'd heard of mnay troubles and was worried I too couldn't do it..I had two friends that told me, it is a challenge but stick with it and you'll get there and it will be great..I actually didn't ahve too many troubles compaed to them..

Information is your friend, so many women just don't have the right info given to them, or they are pressued by well meaning but over zealous midwives into feeling guilty that it's not what they expected..

I like to be honest with pregnant women, it can hurt at first, it can be a challenge, BUT once you get through that it is DEFINATELY worth every second of pain at the begining..well it was for me anyhow..

Anyhow best of luck with your classes, if you have any questions ask away here! I am actually going to be training as an ABA breastfeeding councillor soon, so it will be good practice to help you girls out!

[HipBubbyMama]

I think Katanya has given some wonderful advice here Breastfeeding can be challenging to begin with. It is a natural thing yes, but also very much a learned skill. I totally agree with getting to an ABA class if possible, they are really fabulous and I've found them to be very friendly & supportive.

The key to successful breastfeeding IMO really is support. I had a few breastfeeding dramas in the early weeks of my son's life, and had it not been for the wonderful support from my MCHN, the hospital LC's & the ABA, I may not have been able to successfully breastfeed.

Good luck

[char]

Oh My god my mother used to go on with all that rubbish too!! "Are you feeding her again?" "She's got wind""You're just making it worse"! Aaaaagh
All I can say is that if my baby is happy and content breastfeeding, being close too her mother and enjoying this special bond then it should happen whenever and whereever we like -- and it does! And mum has finally learnt to shut up about it.

[BellyBelly]

I find it realy sad when women say, "I hope I can successfully breastfeed". I know of a really successful midwife and doula/birth attendant (this is according to a leading midwife) who says to her women: "Do you have breasts? Do you have nipples? Do you have a baby? GOOD! Well you CAN breastfeed!" Apparently her women (clients) have really high success rates. I also know of lots of mums who have had homebirths and established breastfeeding themselves with no issues and no pressure. Of course, this isn't the case for everyone, but in the majority of cases, nature as intended does just fine.

I think confidence has alot to say for itself - imagine breastfeeding for the first time and having that confidence instilled into you. Sometimes I think some things are best left alone, like birth and breastfeeding, and things should be intervened IF there is a problem. Confidence and encouragement all the way ladies.

[beckles]

i so agree kelly. i came from a family of ten kids all of whom breastfed or their wives breastfed for at least one year. my mother breastfed all of us. i didn't even know when i had josh that women 'couldn't' or choose not to breastfeed. it was just normal in our family to breastfeed and i think that is why i didn't have the problems that some women had because my sisters supported me and if i was worried about enough milk or unsettled baby they would just say 'whenever the baby's mouth is open stick a breast in it'! i wish it was more socially acceptable to breastfeed then i think we would have a higher success rate. i also think breastfeeding needs to be seen so women can learn from watching as well. anyway enough from me

love beckles

[BellyBelly]

What a wonderful experience that would have been bec - I love the whole communial family support thing. Once upon a time when that used to happen, PND was unheard of and women coped MUCH better and with confidence, no fear of asking for help! The young girls would help tend to the mother too and all felt confident and knew what to do because they saw it first hand from their mothers and family already. Today we are lucky if we actually hold a baby before we have our own, or watch a woman breastfeed or birth a baby... very sad... if only families were still operating this way, we'd have less issues in society.

[Krisvee]

Kelly - I completely agree.

Also - on the topic of the "I will b/f if I can..." I also said that when p/g because you hear/read so much about not being able to do it. I didn't have any troubles with it at all. Slightly sore nipples which were fine with a few applications of cream.

I think more emphasis should be put on the fact that we can do all these things instead of we might not be able to.

At the same time there are times when you feel ready to give up and I do believe people think formula can be the easy option. That's why forums like this are great to keep you going!

[Deejoy17]

Thought I`d update you all, Matthew is now 10 months, I still demand feed him, he usually only wants 3 maybe 4 feeds a day now but I leave it all up to him, if he wants more he can if he doesn`t that`s okay too.

As most of you would know I`m also 19 weeks pregnant and people are really starting to think I`ve got rocks in my head because I`m still feeding Matthew, they all tell me that I`m going to have to stop breastfeeding soon (this includes family members), I don`t see why I have to stop because I`m pregnant. I tell them that I`ll leave it up to Matthew and take a day at a time - you should see the looks I get

Since 15 weeks it hasn`t been an easy job breastfeeding Matthew, as for the first time since my milk came in at 3 days my nipples have been extremely sore, to the point where it brings tears to my eyes when Matthew feeds, but I look at it this way it`s only 3 feeds a day that I get this pain and I`m giving Matthew so much in return so a little bit of pain is not going to stop me breastfeeding, neither Matthew or I are ready to give up just yet..

I just don`t know why so many out their have to judge the way others feed their baby.

Hope everyone else is still going strong with demand feeding.

[belgodfrey]

Hi Dee,

Just wondering how you are going still b/f Matthew? Just asking because I understood that at some point when you're pregnant and feeding, your milk will 'switch' back to colostrum in preparation for the new bubs...

I don't know if that's right or not, would be great if someone had an answer for me. I'm not still feeding myself, but have a couple of pregnant friends that are...


Bel

[Liz]

Hey there, thought I'd have a squiz at this thread, since I'm demand feeding Tallon. I've been preparing myself for the onslaught of "are you feeding AGAIN?" however my mum has been surprisingly supportive of the way I'm choosing to do things. She knows I do loads of research and reading on things, so I guess she feels she can't really argue with it! hehe.

Just on that question of the milk switching back to colostrum for the next bub.. this was asked at the breastfeeding class on Saturday (with the ABA) and they said yes it does switch back, and you'll usually know it's happened because the toddler will get a bit of diarrhoea. Apparently colostrum has a laxative effect to expel the meconium poos in newborns. But that's all that was said, there doesn't seem to be any problems with the milk changing etc. In fact they said it can be a great help having that first child there to help drain your breasts when the milk comes in for the next bub. Less engorgment.

[Phteven]

When my milk came in and I was really engorged with really lumpy boobs I exressed and since I hate waste and Imran is a nipple snob I gave the EBM to Yasin - he loved it so even if your toddler is weaned they can still help you out with engorgement. LOL.

[Deejoy17]

Hi Bel - I`m still breastfeeding Matthew, the sore nipples I had seem to have gone now thank goodness (now I`ve said that I will probably develop sore nipples again). As Ivan mentioned, the older baby will develop diarrhoea once your colostrum comes in but it`s still fine to continue feeding your older toddler, it`s amazing what our bodies know what to do. Anyway I suspected my colostrum came in when I was 16 weeks as Matthew had lots of very dirty nappies (sorry TMI) which was unusual for him, it took a couple of weeks and his poos are back to normal, I can see in my milk it`s a bit watery looking so looks like costrum to me.

So I`m now nearly 24 weeks along, and Matthew`s 11 months - he will have 2 - 3 feeds a day.

Chloe - LOL, always ways around engorgement.

Ivana - That`s great that your Mum has been supportive with you demand feeding this time around. I hope it continues well for you.

[chocolatecatty]

To be honest I'm almost too scared to say that I plan on a (flexible) feeding routing (after a few weeks of DF) rather than on demand....a lot of women I know have done this and their babies have thrived. ..
Not trying to diss anyone who DF's but really....there is a bit of a culture that makes one feel guilty if they go against the majority expressing their views....
In saying this, no, I haven't had my baby yet, so I really have no experience in the matter, but as I said, friends have done what I plan on doing and have had amazing success. I guess it works both ways if you do it right, eh?

[enigma]

I dont believe in raising children according to textbook advice.
someone calculating that a baby should be feeding x amount every 4 hours seems ridiculous to me , every baby is different , Ive only had my princess for 12 days but ive noticed that when she's hungry no matter what she'll let us know, we let her decide the amount she needs aswell.. she's putting on as much weight as she should , she's calm , sleeps well - and im happy too

[Fee]

I sort of demand feed but watch the clock too. I think I would prefer Cooper to have a bit of a routine.

But yes, like others, I can't understand strict routines. It seems a bit cruel to wait 4 hours to feed your baby if they're screaming the house down!

Although at the moment I'm having a bit of trouble reading Cooper's hungry signs. He's always sucking his fist lately and he can be a bit grizzly during the day because I have trouble getting him down for naps. So when he's crying I'm not sure whether it's because he's hungry or overtired. So that's why I watch the clock a bit too.