Thanks for the responses...

N2L I'm 99% sure she doesn't want to come I just wish she would tell us that. If her mum said it I would believe it was her mums choice not hers, we would rather hear it from her so we know she's not being influenced. So true about the outside influences though and unfortunately her mother purposely arranges sleep overs etc when she is meant to be with us, it's the easiest way to convince her not to come.

The only reason she ended up coming this weekend is because her mum had plans and didn't want to pay for a babysitter.