Hi everyone

Sorry I haven't posted for a while. I have been away for work for a few days and didn't have any net access.

Thanks to the ladies who have asked after me. I am feeling okay after the lap - just had my AF and it was much heavier and longer than normal, which I am hoping is a good sign? I still have a bump at the point of one of the incisions which doesn't seem to be reducing in size at all. Is this normal? Is it likely to be internal stitches that haven't dissolved yet? It will be 4 weeks on Monday since the lap so I thought they would be gone by now?

My FS appointment is not until April which seems like ages away still. I was a little annoyed when I got the bill for the lap to find that a biopsy had been taken. While I have read that biopsies are sometimes done, I don't recall my FS mentioning that she would do this and it wasn't on my financial consent docs either, so that was an extra $300 that I wasn't counting on having to pay. I also thought it would have been nice for the FS to mention she had done a biopsy when she came to see me while still in hospital after the procedure. While I was still a bit fuzzy from the anaesthetic, my DF was with me.

Anyway, I have been swinging from thoughts of giving up because I am feeling so down and depressed about everything, that I am too old now and that we just aren't meant to have a baby, to thoughts that we should give the new FS a try and that I am giving up too quickly. Even now I am fighting back the tears writing this, partly because I am hurting and partly because I am missing my DF who is still overseas for work and not back until Monday afternoon. The weekends are the hardest - it's just me and my furbabies. I wish I could feel more upbeat and positive, but some days are so hard, this seems to be one of those. Time to go and hide in front of a movie and have a good cry, after some chocolate of course!

Take care all, I wish I had the strength for personals but am having trouble seeing the screen at the moment through my tears. Talk to you all soon when I have dug myself out of this slump.

xxxx