How do I accept this?

[dusty]

Nic, I hear your pain hunny. Its so totally all encompassing that sometimes its hard to know where to next. The fact that you are continuing shows you have faith even when it is so hard. One step at a time hun. If it helps I believe everything happens for a reason its just up to us to work out what that reason is for each of us. That isn't easy and it isn't something we necessarily want to do. One thing I learned on my LT journey was I became stronger because of it and if faced with other challenges I know I can face them with what I have learnt.

As time went on I gave myself breaks and slowed the process down, appreciating the time and learning to enjoy life a bit more each day. Some days are black but others will have some joy and reason to them, I promise. Sometimes there are steps backwards but really you are going forward in learning more about what is going on and trying different things. Its a hard road to travel but one you have company and support on here. IRL friends find it difficult to know what to say, and I'm sorry your friend didn't respond, that is the hardest thing to bear IME when you open up and there is nothing coming back. We humans are all flawed and don't cope well with sadness & I found that some who hadn't travelled this path just don't know what to say so say nothing. It doesn't necessarily mean they don't care .

Hun you have my share of the chocolate .
I'm here anytime you want to chat about it.
xx

[Elocin]

Thanks girls... I just needed to get it out of my head.

Time is not on my side, so as much as I'd like to take 6 months off the whole TTC bizo, I just can't. DH is 40, we don't have the time to stop.

I just feel broken by all of this. I was in a great headspace last week after the operation. But knowing that there are more tests, more Drs, more money...

Dusty, your description is perfect - my day is black. I hate it, but I don't know how to change it.

[Saffy]

its a tough one hun, we just have to believe as others said that we will succeed and come out of it a stronger person.

rewind a couple of years and I would have been the person on the receiving end of the email you sent- not proudly but I would not have known how to respond either. Its very hurtful to open your heart and not be acknowledged.

i don't know how you can accept it sorry hun, because its not fair and no one should have to xx

[toomanyshoes]

[Amity]

Hugs honey. Thinking of you.

[Persephone1]

Hun, I've been exactly where you have, my heart breaks for you. I could have written that exact post only a year or so ago.

Poo to your silly friend for not responding. Just remember that you're not alone and we're here for you. Massive coming your way. PM me if you need to chat.

[Elocin]

Thanks girls, I appreciate your words more than you will ever know

I just have to shake this fog from my head, I need to focus on the positives - we're both healthy, we have the funds to pay for all of this stuff, DH has standing beside me the whole way - and come to terms with the fact that it's ok that I'm here. Because I won't be here for long.

My baby is just around the corner.

[MummaSue]

It's a tough journey babe, but you have all of the right people by your side.

Your DH sounds like a gem - make sure you are both kind to each other and make sure that you're both kind to yourselves. Especially you

I lost a piece of myself to LTTTC but have gained so much more. It's made me a stronger person, and has made our marriage stronger too.



Your little soul is just waiting.

[Anila]

oh hunni, im not sure what to say, but i want to gve u some hugs

[Manhattan]

I just have to shake this fog from my head, I need to focus on the positives - we're both healthy, we have the funds to pay for all of this stuff, DH has standing beside me the whole way - and come to terms with the fact that it's ok that I'm here. Because I won't be here for long.

My baby is just around the corner.

Yes sweetheart, your baby is just around the corner! I wish you didn't have to go through all this, and I can only imagine how hard this journey is for you. And hun, there is no reason for you to feel guilty, your DH is right, forgive yourself. You never asked for this, and you did nothing to deserve this.

Thinking of you, and praying for you hun