Thanks girls... I just needed to get it out of my head.

Time is not on my side, so as much as I'd like to take 6 months off the whole TTC bizo, I just can't. DH is 40, we don't have the time to stop.

I just feel broken by all of this. I was in a great headspace last week after the operation. But knowing that there are more tests, more Drs, more money...

Dusty, your description is perfect - my day is black. I hate it, but I don't know how to change it.