thanks ladies

have spoken to DH about where we're at with this whole thing, and we've dicided it's ok to feel miserable for a day or two, then we have to refocus - SO, we have an FS appointment on the 26th, and until then we're going to try and "tone down" the house reno's for a while so that a bit of the money we have stashed can be used for IVF if needed. we'll get the new kitchen (cos we need it) but the laundry makeover can wait til we can save up some more $$'s - we're not gonna give up til the FS tells us we've exhausted every possible scenario and then some!

now i just have to tell my brother (aka our contractor) that he only has to do the kitchen for now and that we might want some of the money back