Hi,
I just replied to the other thread before I read this one. You sound like you're in a pretty dark place at the moment and it sucks that you can't see the light at the end of it, or even if there is one. It is really hard trying to give a toss about everything else in life that just doesn't matter to you as much as having a baby would. Jeez, I sound like I am trying to bring you down even further.

My DH has urged me so many times to not let this process change me and not let it change our friendships with others. I think because of this, I sometimes force myself to grin and bear it or 'fake it till I make it'. I am finding that at the moment this is actually working for me. I know that it is for all the wrong reasons and I should be true to myself and show my real emotions and bla bla bla, but I have found that I stress about it less if I force myself out there and see the pregnant friends.

However (I will stop talking soon!) I have been on an enforced break for a while and it's been a while since my last big disappointment, so things in general are a bit easier. Sorry for the giant, rambling, no-help post. Good luck hun