MatthewsMum, grief is so different for everyone. I don't think many people in my life understand the grief I went through - continue to go through - with the loss of our baby in January. For me it was the culmination of many losses experienced over a long period of time, and that made it particularly difficult. So I guess what I'm saying is that your loss of Matthew is a very particular to you and how it affects you will be different to how it affects others. I hope the visualizations you are doing help, I find them very comforting. You'll let go of Matthew when you are ready, in your own time and in your own way, and he will always be with you and be part of your life and your family. Sometimes it's good to have others acknowledge the loss we are still experiencing because it helps us continue to understand our grief, if that makes sense. to you xx