I really understand what you mean. I am going to start TTC next year and because me and DP dont have very much of a sex life (we prob DTD once a fortnight) there are months where we've done it once. But i am hoping it picks up when we TTC.

Maybe you should try things that help you relax so try massages and just laying next to each other. Me and DP bought a sex game and to start off we have to ask questions like what is it about your partner that you like the most, what body feature is your favourite and stuff like that. We found it really worked.