Fi - Ken and I are thinking of you in this tough time. I too know the pain of loosing a baby.
I too had to rant and rave to get my way when I lost my first one. I ended up going to hospital just to get it done. The public system isn't fair at all.
It's definately not your fault. I'm really glad you aren't bashing yourself up about it.
Look after yourself and hopefully we'll see you in a Buddy forum soon. Hugs to you and Shane.
Thank you all,
your kind words have made me cry - again!!! Seems like the thing to do today.
I'm booked into the day stay in the brithing suites for a D&C tomorrow. My dr seemed a little bit guilty, which is good. She even bulk billed me - which she has NEVER done - so maybe feeling a bit bad.
She gave me the option of naturally miscarrying, and I said no, and I appreciate her doing the right thing by giving me all the options.
It was quite funny when we went in, she said - do you know that its bad news. (I've got a bright red nose from crying and she says that!!). When I told her I had opened the films and read the report, plus I had discussed with the dr, she was quite surprised to find me so well informed. She herself had called the dr to make sure there was absolutely no chance they had missed the heartbeat and maybe my dates were wrong. They assured her there was definiitly no living/moving baby - so no surprise twin for me!!
She said if I decided to miscarry naturally, she has heard it go on for weeks, which I just dont want to deal with. And I dont want to see it.
She believes that it was the gastro, of course we have no way of ever knowing, but my cervix is closed, and my uterus is all fine. She says there are just some bugs that are really bad for babies, and the one I got was likely that way.
So hopefully I wont get mucked around tomorrow. I go in at 11am, fasting from 7am, and provided there aren't any emergencies that tie up the theatres, they will deal with me. Otherwise I may be waiting til Monday - yuck.
So again - thanks for your kind wishes, it means alot to me.
I really feel for you Fi - I had my second m/c just under a week ago and nothing can prepare you for the shock of seeing an abnormal scan. No one should have to go through such trauma - life should not be this harsh.Take time out for yourself and to grieve for your baby and make sure you demand the medical care you deserve especially if you would pefer a D&C.
Take care.
So sorry for what you are going through. Life is such a sh*t sometimes!
It yanks my chain when you say that you had to ask, beg plead for a scan knowing that something may have been wrong. What with the public system sometimes?
I must say I have had a +ve experience with them sometimes but have learnt if you need to get something done that they don't want to do, just fall on the floor and pretend to be in agonising pain, it works believe yopu me, they'll rush you in and give you priority!
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Fi I'm so so sorry to hear of your bad news.
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