Dr said she believe i am/was pregnant.. she sent me for a quantitive test and said she just wants to confirm it is miscarryin itself. She said if the levels come back higher than she thinks they should she will send me for an ultrasoound to see what is happening.
I said do you think this is just something else? she said nope. this is a very very unusal bleed, and only says to her pregnancy, or the end of.
I walked out of the clinic got in my car and burst into tears! Why? why the hell am i crying for a baby yesterday i was happy i didnt have? ( obviously because deep down i want to be pregnant, i just wanted to loose my wieght and get the psoriasis under control before i did have #3..... but to know this has guttered me.
She told me to stop the pill (i took my first one last night as i thought it was just af starting), as she said just incase it isnt a loss...
But with how much and how bright red the blood is. I have never seen such bright red blood before *scratchs head*
THANKS SO MUCH FOR REPLYING TO ME GUYS... this is seriously hard for me. i guess you proberly think im silly, seeing as i stopped trying and wanted to wait. argh. im gonna go. im being silly
No you're not being silly at all. I cried too when I had an early loss in August. We start thinking about this little life who belongs to us, we start to think about what the future will be like with them, and then it is snatched away from us. It's truly devestating .
Although I'm sure you are probably feeling like you are expecting the worst, I really hope that everything turns out alright .
im sorry to hear what you're going through hun. i cried too when i lost my bub, i didnt know i was pg untill i lost it i hink i was crying for what could have been...
i passed the 'product' in the waiting room toilets.. as much as i didnt want to look, i felt i had to, and ill never forget it to think that could have been a healthy baby breaks my heart.
i was told to expect flu-like symptoms after my miscarriage... i cant remember exactly what i felt, but i recall feeling overall pretty cruddy for a week or so.
big hugs hun, its a very emotional confusing time.
It's the unfairest thing in this world that a mother should still feel pregnant when her baby has flown away. It doesn't make any difference whether or not you were trying, what matters are your feelings NOW - don't keep discounting them by saying you're being 'silly' because you're being very normal!
For what its worth Missy, IMO it's better to know, because then you can grieve. It's not always possible to know when someone has an early loss, but I like to think of it as a blessing when you do know, because now your baby will never be forgotten.
Even worse now as someone i thought was a friend was just very insensitive about it.. /crys. I have sat and listened to her through a few cycles now and this is what i get back when i need my friends right now made me feel like maybe im being silly.. but then part of me says no, no your not.
*crys*
Everything today seems to be just horrible... i just wanna go to bed!
Whats worse is tomorrow i have to pull myself together, as i have a wedding to do. in 43 degree heat.... i am just so guttered!
Also Ditto to what BG said... It always hurts..... also HUGS BG.... you sound like you have been through alot....
I feel your pain. Its an aweful thing to go through. I hope you have some friends or family you can talk to at this time. I found talking bout it helped.After keeping things to myself for such a long time it was eatting away at me. Once i had opened up a good friend of mine suggested releasing a white balloon into the sky and saying a few things. It really helped me. It helped me to let go and open up about my feelings. If you need to chat i'm a good listener....
RIP little angel babies.... Always in our hearts
Last edited by Je$$_84; February 6th, 2009 at 03:48 PM.
Take care.
BellyBelly Life Subscriber & MPM
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