Well done Chody sounds like you're entitled to feel the way you do. I can't comprehend how that must feel, not being able to hold her. Hopefully she is out of the humidicrib soon for cuddles!

Sounds like expressing is going well too! Small amounts of colostrum was what I got too, the nurses told me that bubs tummy would only hold 5ml or so. Pumping 3 hourly is hard work, especially at night... I had to feed Ava, then pump and feed her what I had pumped, it is time consuming and it must be tough doing it when you can't hold bub or even have a snuggle with her to make waking up a bit nicer

I hope this all passes quickly for you and that you can have as many snuggles as you like soon