DH about to hit the wall... and I'm feeling disillusioned

[Coolabahdee]

:hugs: sweety, myself nor my DH are afflicted by depression, so I am no expert, but perhaps getting him to see a counselor to have a chat would be the way to go...again I don't know.

All I know is having a baby puts a huge strain on anyones relationship, suddenly there is this whole other person who's needs outweigh everyone else's. I'd say you need to look after yourself first and foremost so that you are able to look after baby and just be there to support DH but you can't look after him too IYKWIM. As for the romantic notion, well we all have that, a lucky few get it, some won't see it at all and a few of us get it in spurts. Your DH is kidding himself if he thinks what you are currently doing is easy, many studies affirm the fact that a mother of a newborn particularly work twice as hard as a man doing a day's work, I get that things are very stressful for him at work right now too, My DH works, and at the time when our kidlets were babies he worked, 14hours a day, so I certainly didn't expect him to change nappies and cook dinner when he got home, but I wished he would, lol. But handing bub over for a cuddle and a play was always great for him and me. I could get dinner on the table and even have a shower by myself ( ohh the luxuries) but I am pretty lucky as DH has always changed nappies and when ff he'd give a bottle, I'd even express so he could feed coz it was relaxing and bonding and they could have a good chat. Don't worry that the house isn't up to speed or that dishes aren't done straight after dinner or that you haven't done a load of washing in a few days, it doesn't go anywhere. If things are getting to you, go for a walk through the park, ring a girlfriend and go for coffee, and talk, it's important to offload and if your girlfriends have had babies they will understand and can offer support. Or come in here and have a chat. You can't look after your DH too but you can look after your relationship with him, spending some time together, just the two of you is important, you need to invest in your relationship, keep the fires burning so to speak. If you can get out together for an evening or for lunch, do it, it's really worth it. I hope I was helpful, big hugs to you.
cheers
Dee