Yep, possessiveness is normal. Well, I say that because my DS does it too LOL He gathers all his stuff into a box or a wagon and it goes everywhere with him. Actually, it's settled down a bit now, he still yells at Kayla to go away if she's going near his current favourite toy, but he's not hording them like he used to. I used to laugh and say he'd make a great homeless man with his trolley of stuff. haha.

I think if his demands of helping him get them on the table are getting to you, then stop helping him. Tell him you're not going to help him until he asks nicely or something.

As for food.. no alternative foods in this house! If he picks at the meal that he's given, then that's his problem. I'm finding DS has picky days (not fussy... just picks and doesn't eat much) and then he has eat-all-day days! But yeah, he doesn't get anything else if he doesn't eat his meal. He's allowed to have an apple or something a bit later, but not a different meal. I've never catered to how things are cut or presented either.. except for giving him the choice of squares or triangles (everyone should have that choice )