Hello, I would recommend getting straight into a behaviour support program, though the local child health service. The ppl who run these courses will give you lots of strategies for managing the behaviour, but most of all they give you non judgemental understanding and support! It's like having Super Nanny at your house but without the cameras. I agree about the PPP program, it's very good and widely used.

You're not alone, there is light at the end of the tunnel, but please don't wait until it escalates before you get some decent support for your whole family so you can start to enjoy and appreciate each other again!