Adorning girls

[Maruschke]

I don't do fancy clothes or make up or jewelery and I think DD1 has picked up on it. I do look clean and presentable, but I go no further with either myself or DD1. She does get to play dress ups at home and I pay attention to what style she chooses. None of it is pink dresses, lol. But likewise, if "pretty" was her choice, I'd go with that too. As for headbands, I personally can't stand them!

[little_mrs]

I'm in no way the fashion guru or very girly at all, but like most others I like me and DD to be neat most of the time. Although i don't bother changing us out of yardwork type clothes if we're just going to get milk, and if it's cold out and her pj's are warm I'll leave her in them! Having said that, she does have lots of pretty clothes and quite often the daycare teachers comment on how nice she always looks, and that makes me proud. On the headbands, when she was a bub I'd put them on her coz they were cute, and I'm so glad I did coz now that she needs them to keep hair out of her eyes she doesn't just take them straight off like she would if she hadn't been used to them. You'll see us both most often in football shirts or flanny & jeans

[chody47]

I very rarely dress DD in 'pretty' clothes. Yes, I try to make sure that she looks presentable when we go out (eg, make sure she is not covered in her most recent meal), but I would say that I tend to dress her in more practical clothes than pretty clothes. She has very rarely ever been put in a dress (although I did for her birthday) - the last time I put her in one it made crawling too hard so she was out of it quick smart.

I guess my frame of mind when I dress her (or buy clothes for her) is:
1. What's fairly cheap so I don't mind if it's ruined by being stained or getting holes in it by crawling around our backyard
2. What is going to be comfortable and not restrict movement

I know this is a slightly different topic, but I sometimes feel sorry for little girls who are dressed in clothes and shoes that they can't run around in (when they are in a situation that's appropriate to do that). In my humble opinion I feel it doesn't help them develop their gross motor skills.

[LuluHB]

I'm not a girly girl and never have been but was raised with that oh so English obsession with "looking decent" in public. I grew up riding horses and so 99% of the time I was muddy, grimey and just plain gross. I would never, ever stop at the shops on the way home though It wasn't unheard of for me to go home, have a shower and change, and then drive back to the shops for milk, bread or whatever.

My girls on the other hand have somehow managed to be completely obsessed with dresses - the "twirlier" the better. I have no idea where it comes from because I don't think I actually own a dress. They love ribbons, clips etc and have lots of play jewellery. None of it ever matches but they love wearing it. I do ensure they look clean and tidy when we go out, although it doesn't matter what I do to their hair its looking whispy and crazy within 5 minutes! Having said that though, we went out to a fete today and when we got home they played outside. I had to empty the bathwater twice because they were so dirty so they're not prissy.

I have lots of issues re appearance and what actually constitutes beauty within DH's family so I am very, very consistent in trying to instil in the girls that beauty has nothing to do with your weight or what you're wearing. I will more likely tell them they're gorgeous when they're covered in mud, wood chips and grass than I will when they're wearing a pretty dress. As far as I'm concerned nothing is more beautiful than the huge grin and smiling eyes of a kid that's having a ball outside in the dirt.

As for headbands on babies - ewwwwww.

[Sunny Love]

My kids look like they've come straight from the Kmart catalogue and then rolled around in some brightly coloured paint and dirty mud. Thats the way I like it too

[Heaven]

I just dress them like I would for myself.

So I buy them just normal shorts and t-shirts, etc for around the house. We pick whatever colours they like and whatever they think is nice. They play outside every day and DD2 always ends up with a wardrobe change after lunch anyway LOL, so they are never really wearing 'fancy' clothes around the house. But then we also have nice clothes and dresses for going out because I think it's fun to get dressed up in different clothes. But I don't just get dressed up to go to the shops or anything, I mean like if we're going somewhere special. So we do both. Mainly I'm just concerned about what's comfortable and practical but also looks nice. But honestly, I think they look gorgeous in anything.

They do like to dress up though. And people have bought them the 'princess' dress up clothes and other 'pretty' things. I actually rarely buy them any clothes, we're still trying to get through all the presents they get so I guess I don't really get that much of a say in their clothing anyway, lol. DD1 has decided her favourite color is pink, I guess she's noticed that's mostly what color little girls clothes are.

Anyway, whatever they wear we try not to comment on appearance much anyway. We might say 'Oh, that's a fancy dress' or something if we're all dressed up. But we try to avoid going over the top with 'pretty' and 'beautiful'. Everyone else seems to make up for it though.

[Sagres]

I enjoy fashion to an extent and do enjoy it through my girls but my girls often get called boys because my idea of fashion does not include pink and girly. For example I love sweater dresses at the moment but in navy and cream, grey or muted olive greens. It doesn't bother me what gender people think they are and I am happy for DD1 to dress herself which usually means she will wear blue with blue or yellow with yellow.

I am like this, I am interested in me and my girls looking 'stylish' I suppose you would say (can't think of a better word), but that style does not really include 'pretty' or 'girly' as such. On the contrary I tend to avoid the styles that are overly frilly or featuring embroidered flowers etc. for no other reason than my own style is a bit more classic, clean lines, simple, elegant and not very decorated IYKWIM. Maybe that is just my thing, or maybe subconsciously I am avoiding being too stereotypically 'girly'? Not sure...

So no, I don't feel any pressure to dress them to look pretty. DD1 gets called a boy every now and then, it doesn't bother me. I think you are going to get that what ever you do, LOL DH was changing DD1's nappy once and had to answer the door (we were expecting some one) and the person called DD1 a boy even though she was butt naked! Does't get much more obvious!

I should say that mostly applies for going out to special events/special occasions/restaurants/visiting relatives etc. but for day to day it is much more about practicality: keeping warm, able to get off quickly for toilet trips, things that don't show up mess too easily, able to climb things at kindergym etc. but with the underlying tone of our 'style'.

[Bumperstump Cummerbund]

I can tell you right now, any daughter of mine is going to be wearing bright colours which may or may not contain sparkles or glitter, and headbands with big flowers on them until they are old enough to tell me NO!

That is my choice however, based on what I dress myself in. I draw the line at matchy-matchy though

[sangie]

I have felt some pressure from DH's family. My niece who is the same age as my DD (nearly 5) is ALWAYS what I call 'dolled up' lol. For every family dinner I can remember her parents dress her in a full length party dress. Each to their own but what I really can't stand are the constant comments from MIL in particular saying how 'gorgeous' and 'pretty' she looks. And she ALWAYS wears pink. My DD on the other hand would turn up at the same dinner in something like leggings and a t-shirt or a skirtwith leggings in a colour other than pink and would get no comments funnily enough. Luckily we don't do extended family dinners very often! No matter what they are wearing though I always make sure my kids are clean and tidy, faces and hands wiped and hair presentable before we walk out the front door (as much as possible lol)

I love clothes but when it comes to my kids I've always dressed them in what I think are practical and comfy clothes. Now that DD is a bit older she chooses her own outfits and she has become quite girly in the last couple of years and will choose dresses over pants. She absolutely hates jeans and refuses to wear them. Clearly she didn't get that from me because I live in jeans! Her preference is dresses or skirts with leggings or tights underneath or just leggings with a top.

I'm not a fan of headbands on babies but on little girls I think they are cute. DD has a couple that she likes to wear sometimes. She did have three but one got 'lost' in the dirt apparently haha!

[Olive]

My girls pretty much refuse pants and will not wear trackies lol!
They own lots of nice clothes because that's all I buy, when DD1 was litte I was too worried about wreaking her good clothes that she never wore then, such a waste so they wear 'nice' stuff every day.
I like them to look nice for their self confidence but don't make them pretty so to speak ( they are rather cute though lol)

ETA sangie DD1hasnt worn jeans in almost 2years, I just got her into 3/4 jean shorts recently, DD2 is the same.
Winters for us are dresses/skirts with leggings/thights

[fionas]

No, I don't feel any pressure to make our DDs look pretty but they've inherited very fine hair from me which is a complete disaster as it gets matted really easily.

I'll just follow their lead. DD1 is a tomboy who's not particularly interested in clothes but she has become completely obsessed with a particular pinafore dress she has. I think it's because it has no arms and is super comfortable and she can climb trees in it just as easily as she can in pants.

DD2, I think, will be a different kettle of fish. She grabs hats and shoes at any opportunity and is generally more girly than DD1.

Either way, that's fine by me. They'll never hear me talking about my looks, body shape etc. etc. just as I never heard my mum talking about those things. Hopefully, that will go some way to shielding them from the amount of rubbish that's out there about how girls/women should look.

[grub17]

i like to dress my dd pretty but don't feel pressure too. (today she lived in a nappy and little pair of pants to stop her pulling said nappy off! lol) I like both my kids to look 'nice' when going out.
I tuck DS's shirt into his shirts, hike his shorts all the way up, put his sandals on and comb his hair to the side - love that look. Know he'll be showing off his jocks and mohawk soon enough!
With DD, we do hippy days, french days, yellow, purple, orange days, dress days, headband days etc and then we do 'oops left you in your pjs all day' days
I like the kids to look "nice'' when going out and their shorts/shirt/dress/undies match.
BUT I also like to hang my clothes out using matching pegs.... Dh thinks i'm nuts about my pegs and kids' clothes

[anney]

I don't spend much time on hair makeup or clothes. Nothing about how I look defines who i am. But for some reason, ever since she could dress herself dd has changed her clothes multiple times a day ( when she was 14 months i would find her in her room trying to squeeze two legs into one leg hole in a pair of shorts!) and at about 5 started to spend lots of time doing hair, again multiple times a day and now that she is getting pimples, uses concealer before school. I don't know where she gets this from and I try to instill in her that looks are not important. We have never really done "pretty" but she did go through a very pink stage but sadly now I have to steer her away from black.

[trishalishous]

I did for photo occasions, now im glad if she just doesnt try and strip every 30 seconds!

[Ladylove]

I love dressing up my DD as I love clothes and dressing myself. I draw the line at hair accessories though as my tiny DD pretty much has no hair so that would just be silly :P

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

If you have a daughter, do you feel it necessary to make her look pretty?

I don't think it is necessary to make my girls look pretty, when in public i try to make sure they look presentable (clean clothes, face, hands etc).
DD1 has always been quite independant and likes to choose her own clothes, she has more fashion sense than i do - she likes to match her tops with her pants or her shoes, she like lipgloss and hair clips and 'pretty' sunglasses but i never make a big deal about them looking pretty,

When we go to parties etc they generally get to wear a nice dress or jeans with a nice jacket and sometimes they match their hairclips etc.
This was mainly duie to the fact DD1 had longish hair as a toddler and it was more manageable with hairclips and she liked different ones.

That said around the house my girls wear tracksuit pants, boys clothes, gumboots, paint or mud stained clothes and on some occasions wont even brush their hair, they wear bandana's under their motorbike helmets and go and slide in the mud.
If we go to a party and they get dirty i don't care either, clothes are clothes & kids are kids.

Most of our stuff comes from K-mart or target when they have sales, the girls have some GORGEOUS clothes family have bought them form places like PP but they don't wear them all the time.

Anyone from BB who's met me knows i am a big tomboy, i care very little about 'fashion' i NEVER wear make up and i couldn't care less if someone wore $500 shoes or $5 shoes, as long as they look presentable, thats all that matters to me.

[Ladylove]

I should add I come from a high achieving academic and career background, these values of which were instilled into my by my own family, who ALSO taught me that dressing and presenting well are important in many situations. It's all horses for courses of course but I wore makeup, shaved my legs etc as a teen and i still managed to be a straight A student. A girl can be intellectual or hard working or whatever and still enjoy feeling good about her appearance.

That said I know it is hard to instill this I'm young girls - or rather, teach them that pretty is not everything, that what constitutes 'pretty' is actually a highly subjective thing and that there are far more and better ways to value who you are as a person.

[Charlotte91]

I make sure DD is presentable. Some of the outfits she wears at home are scary, just whatevers on the top of the pile.
If we go out I make sure whatever she's wearing isn't too stained. It depends where we're going. Up the street, whatever she's in. Be that filthy or clean.
Going to town for appointments, something a bit nicer. "Nicer" meaning "less stained".

She has her hair clipped/tied back because it gets in her eyes and they go red.

I may not always have her face clean, but DD is a cutie to me and I love her. I don't care what other people think of her.