Oh gosh, Outback Woman, what an incredibly difficult, stressful situation you are in. I dont have anything constructive to add but I wanted to offer you a and the best of luck finding something that works. I think that if the electric fence is your only option then do it.

N2L- are you saying that OW should be supervising her toddler when she's asleep? How is that possible? Maybe her and her DH could take it in shifts, or should she just not sleep at all?

NOTE- I'm NOT trying to attack you, I just dont understand how it's possible to supervise a child 24/7 and am trying to understand how the "system" works in that regard.