I treat it like any relationship that I want to succeed: sometimes I do things that I don't enjoy, without an expectation of tit-for-tat, because I love them.

My DH loves sports. Really loves them. Some seasons, he will play, coach AND umpire soccer, and he'll still hang around before to make sure all the lines are properly chalked (he'll do it again if they're not) and then he'll stay for the matches afterwards to make sure there's enough lineskeepers, umpires, etc. And then he watches it at home ... I don't like watching sport. I genuinely don't see the point AT ALL.

But I love him, so I'll go watch him play sometimes, I'll listen to him talk about it a bit, I don't complain when he wants to dress the boys in their team's colours, I'll let him explain to me (again) the rules of cricket, I facilitate him getting a "proper" round of golf in periodically, I understand that he will be setting alarms for weird and wonderful times to see races and matches and I have zero expectation of watching any of my shows during the Olympics (though I do tape them all and binge watch them later, and he says not a word about that!)

This is because I love him, and I see it as being part of who he is.

He knows I don't like them, he doesn't expect me to participate, he doesn't ask me often to come and watch his matches - but he does know that he has a high enough place in my heart that if there's something special, he can ask, and I will probably say yes - because I want to do it as an act of love, not because I have to, or because I have suddenly felt an intense need to watch the All Blacks smash the Partially Greys.

This goes for friends too - my friend who has a deep love of model trains (seriously - I'm not making that up) or the one who talks about NOTHING except for her dog, or the one ... you get the picture.

I love them. And to them, I'm probably the one who always wants to go dancing, or the one who erroneously thinks her stories about court cases are SO INTERESTING while they're dying inside, etc.

Now, my kids like some things I don't like - and they don't yet have the self awareness or the empathy or the whatever it is, to realise that I am my own human being with my own likes and dislikes and millions of thoughts, and while I can think things through, and filter my comments and conduct - they're learning all that.

So when my boys want to play doggies (which I really don't like) I don't want them doing it, and I really don't want to join in. So sometimes I don't, I just let them go along with it, and I remind myself that they'll grow out of it - sometimes I'll join in and remind myself that they'll grow out of it and my knees will soon stop hurting, and other times, I tell them "I don't really want to play that - but I do want to play with you. Do you want to build a snowman [or whatever]" and that gives them the choice.

But I make sure it's not, "I am not going to play doggies, I don't like that. I am happy to play penguins - so if you want to play with me, you can come and play penguins together." because I really, really don't want them to get the impression that if they want to spend time with me, they have to do what I like.

So I try to balance it.

They are too young to practice the give-take that happens in healthy friendships, marriages, etc - so I guess I try to manage that for them - and at this stage, it's obviously weighted pretty heavily in their favour.

I give opportunities for them to consider others' feelings (each other, and mine, etc) but I'm not expecting them to have the maturity of a 12 year old when they're 2 or 3 ... there's time for that!

I hope that makes sense.

That's what works for me