HotI sounds interesting but how do get both parents to be on the same team? Dh just won't or can't parent like me?
Aha, that is a different question. I am still working that one out. A few times DH has tried something that i didn't think would work, and it has. Similarly, he watches me do things and then i see that changes how he parents. I don't think i have all the answers, but there are some things i don't want my kids exposed to. So, there is a bit of give and take but we both have limits and try to respect each others.

DH won't read the books i get, but is happy to discuss the bits i find interesting. So that's kinda where we are.