Things you never thought you would have to say as a parent

[RhiChiChi]

"Why did you pour water all over my tummy? ... Uh, no, you're little sister doesn't drink through my belly button. NO not my vagina either!"

I've also had to tell her off in the shower for trying to spread my bum cheeks and try and look at her little sister.

Bahahaha!

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

I can never tell sarcasm on forums, but are you joking??

No, he does have to start to work harder in school. It is very frustrating when I have spent a lot of time working on his reading skills for him to turn around and tell me that he's not worried, he'll be able to read when he's grown-up without putting in any work now. Just like he'll be fluent in French, play 4 different instruments, drive a car and all the rest - he doesn't see that you have to work hard for your rewards.

And the fact that he says "can't do it" and "don't know" a lot at school to stay at the same level, which he gleefully tells me is "easy" and dashes through his reading books without any effort - why would I not be upset about that? (I have bought books the next stage up and he can read them fairly fluently already, he just can't be bothered to have to do it for school.)

[loulabelle]

No, he does have to start to work harder in school. It is very frustrating when I have spent a lot of time working on his reading skills for him to turn around and tell me that he's not worried, he'll be able to read when he's grown-up without putting in any work now. Just like he'll be fluent in French, play 4 different instruments, drive a car and all the rest - he doesn't see that you have to work hard for your rewards.

And the fact that he says "can't do it" and "don't know" a lot at school to stay at the same level, which he gleefully tells me is "easy" and dashes through his reading books without any effort - why would I not be upset about that? (I have bought books the next stage up and he can read them fairly fluently already, he just can't be bothered to have to do it for school.)

I get that. I was only posting about the last sentence. About slowly accepting he isn't as smart as you wanted . I didn't know If that was a joke or not.

[loulabelle]

One from just then ' no, the medicine helps your ear, it's not going to turn you into a pink river dolphin'

[Purple Penguin]

"Stop rubbing your piece of apple on your cheek"

[Beach Mama]

Pink river dolphin too cute!

Tonight I had to tell J to stop licking my foot! kids are seriously odd at times!!!!

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

I get that. I was only posting about the last sentence. About slowly accepting he isn't as smart as you wanted . I didn't know If that was a joke or not.

OK, watching my words now. How dare I express upset at my son not being as academically minded as I had hoped?

But here's another one: "No, you don't swing Kitty around by her tail."

[Novella]

Today 'I understand you can't wear your top because it has poo on it, but you shouldn't make your sister take her shirt off and give it to you'

[Santosha]

'Please close your mouth when you kiss me'. 3 year old affection is lovely, but I don't really want a big pash, especially when it usually comes with added snot.

[misty]

I've said so many of these things and more!

The Flying Butter - we've had to deal with that with my DD1, completely understand the frustration!

'yes you do have a big doodle, now pull your pants up and stop showing everyone!' is a constant mantra to my 3yr old.

[Starfish]

Don't put honey wheats in my shoe.

[HomeStyleMumma]

This is the funniest thread I've cracked up numerous times! I'm sure I could list literally hundreds of my own comments but can't think of any right now.... One my sister said to her 3yr old fs the other day tho... 'put your willy away until you are IN the bathroom!'

[Mrs P]

Don't put your toothbrush on your vagina (while in the bath)

Yes you did hurt Mummy's (pregnant) boobies but you don't need to kiss them better.

Don't wipe your boogies on the cat.

[HotI]

if you think you have done poos, just ask mum or dad to check. you don't need to stick your finger in your nappy to find out.

[jlk]

Oh god after 19 years I could fill a whole
Thread, hahaha

[LuluHB]

Thought of another one

No, it is not appropriate for you to sit on opposite sides of the toilet so you can both wee at the same time. . . . No, I don't care that it saves time.

[HomeStyleMumma]

Lol lulu I had to laugh at that one... I distinctly remember doing that exact thing with one of my sisters when we were really little!

[~clover~]

Don't lick the dog.
I don't really know why the bone in your doodle gets bigger... ask dad.
Stop pinching your sisters backside.
Don't wee on your sisters head :shakeshead:
No, you can't drive. Maybe next time.
No babe. I won't kiss your pecker better...