Hi KAM - I am so sorry for the journey you have travelled and the loss of your precious babies. You have found the best place to share your worries...everyone here is so understanding and supportive...I wish I could answer your question...day by day here...somedays ok others I'm terrified...but I always find it's so much better to share than keep it all bottled up...look forward to sharing your journey until you hold your little one in your arms!
Kam, I am so sorry that you have had to go through so much loss. Pregnancy is a very difficult journey for many of us. I had horrible nightmares with my last pregnancy. I had to take a very long nap every afternoon to catch up on sleep. The only thing that helped me through each day was knowing that I had some great doctors that were doing everything they could to keep my baby safe. I had weekly ultrasounds to check on my little ones fluid, growth, and movement. I also had non stress tests each week to check on bubs HB. Even with all of the extra monitoring, I was a mess. Take each day at a time, you will get there.
everyone
It has been a bit quiet in here.
Just wanted to let everyone know that my appt. went great today. bub was measuring perfectly and wiggling all over. I made my 12 week scan appt. I am going to try really hard to not think about the 17 week scan. It is a bit scary that it is so close already.
KAM - I hear you so so clearly. I am now in my fourth pregnancy since July 08 and still no baby at home. All I can offer is my love and support and some of my philosophies. Despite just having had a rought weekend with anxiety and a very deep sense of foreboding,and wanted to run around screaming like a lunatic.
Despite that, I am generally able to be thankful for and beleive in this pregnancy. Each day I cherish what I have right now which is this baby. I don't focus on the past( what has happened in my journey) nor the future ( what might happen), but I try to focus on today, and it helps me. It's not perfect, but more often than not I am able to cope. I often just lay quietly with my hands on my tum, and repeat, "I beleive".
I hope you can find some happy medium where the fear and anxeity is not the most prominent feeling for you every day, and there are some periods of belief and hope.
I am so so sorry for the loss of your darling angel babies. I wish that you didn't have to experience the terror of bleeding in this pregnancy. It does make it so much harder to cope. I know its hard, but this pregnancy is not your previous pregnancies. This pregnancy is different, even if that is all you can believe in.... it's something.
Sending you my strength and love.
Laney - HA! I have been asking about you in another thread. I am ROTFL now, always wondering where you were and what was happening. Huge Dory moment for me. Anyway, glad I found you again. I know you're scared sweetie, big hugs. What dates are those next scans?
Beata - So good to hear things are going well with our young hero Cameron. He is looking mighty cute too I have to say. You know I think I might reactivate my ticker. I just have to remember once I have done it to immediately turn it off when I post in the loss and tcc threads.
Kerr - hugs - I don't have much to ofer by way of advice or info, but sending you a big hug.
AFM - well 18 weeks tomorrow! I have been at home alone with teh fur babies since 7 weeks, so it's amazing to think that I have not been at work for 11 weeks! I don't miss it anymore.
Time seems to inch forward so slowly but its forward progression is inevtiable. I had a bad weekend - as I said to KAM, I had a very palpable sense of foreboding, mostly because there was a decrease in my sensing bubs move. Anyway, come Monday, even though things hadn't really improved I for some reason just felt hapy again and lo and behold, I felt bubs moving like something possessed. I feel proud of myself that I made it through the 3 days, feel a bit battered, but proud because I survived. I am noticing I am a bit more anxious at the moment, but given my history its understandable.
Take care, and belly rubs to you all. I'll get to work on that ticker.
starbright, it sounded like you have been thinking of moving for a while. You sound so happy every time you take a trip to see family. You still have time! I don't know about finding a doctor that you feel comfortable with so close to c-section date. There are a lot of expenses when dealing with a big move. I hope it all works out for you.
Didn't you have DS a bit early? I thought I remember you not making it to your c-section date.
dory, my next scan is on May 17th. My doctor told me that I can have all of my scans done in his office. He doesn't mind if I do not want to see my high risk doctor. That is if this baby keeps growing beautifully.
I was going to ask you if you quit work. Do they have you on bed rest?
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