Hi Clare, it sounds as if you're feeling really unsupported and invalidated by your care providers. It might be worth making an appt with your ob (or health provider that you do know to be supportive) to discuss your situation so far, he/she may well be able to provide you with some reassurance, as well as putting the events so far into a medical context for you. Also, they might be able to give you some tips on how to get your concerns heard when you are in a situation that is causing you a high degree of distress. Patient distress, IMO, is a perfectly good reason for a GP or midwife to be making time to see you, I think I would be quite stressed too.

Most of all, I want to say be kind to yourself, do something nice for yourself. Bonding and connecting with bub can take time, and the best way to do this is by looking after yourself, claiming some of the nurturing energy you need for yourself. I found visualising myself myself surrounded by a lovely rose pink bubble of love really helped when I was all strung out.

I hope you're feeling better soon
:-)