thread: Your thoughts on finding out the sex

  1. #1
    Ms Lee Guest

    Your thoughts on finding out the sex

    I just couldn't wait to find out the sex of my baby. How could I go in there knowing that the information was there to be had and not having it. It's like putting a bit of chocolate in front of me and telling me not to eat it. I just had to know!

    Mind you I didn't take it as gospel and knew that there could have been a risk that it was wrong but the doctor told us he thought she was a girl at 12 weeks and then confirmed it at 18. I also had a scan at 36 weeks and they still predicted a girl so I was fairly positive.

    My view is that it is still a surprise no matter whether you get it at 18 or 40 weeks. At the birth there is so much else to find out, what he/she looks like, finalizing the name and most importantly having a safe delivery and healthy birth.

    We also didn't tell anyone else that we had found out so it was a very special secret that only the two of us shared and we felt that our bond with her was made all the more special because she wasn't an 'IT'.

    I know people feel differently about it so what's your view?
    Have you found out with one and not the other?
    Would you do it differently next time?

  2. #2
    BellyBelly Life Member

    Jul 2004
    House of the crazy cat ladies...

    From the beginning I thought I was having a boy.
    At the 12 weeks ultrasound I asked the sonagrapher if she could tell what gender it was, and she ummed and ahhed and said it was too early to tell, but eventually gave in and said it could possibly be a boy!
    All of this was confirmed at the 18 week ultrasound, and after seeing his little 'boy bits' on the screen, there was absolutely NO mistsking what sex he was.
    It was great to find out for sure, seeing as since the beginning of my PG we had been referring to him as Little Pup... just assuming he was male, so it was special to find out that we were right!
    I also like knowing the gender in advance so I had more options when buying clothing and items for his nursery, I just like to be prepared I guess... It was also nice to be able to concentrate on just boys names as well.
    I don't think I could ever wait until me child was born to find out its sex... I am just too impatient, and way too excited! I was DYING to find out Aidyns sex from the very day I got a BFP!

  3. #3

    Hi Ms Lee

    We didn't want to know with Kameron but as soon as the ultrasound had started it was right on the geniltalia so it was a bit hard to miss !! We did not tell family though in case it was wrong although i went on to have another 5 ultrasounds (7 in total) and was told a boy all the way thru it.

    With Lachlan we did want to know in case I had to start looking at girl things to buy and we were pretty confident it was a boy since the willy was on the u/sound video as well and we told the whole family.

    Love :hbeat:

  4. #4
    BellyBelly Member

    Aug 2004

    ms lee, i am with you, it is a surprise no matter what stage you dind out.

    we are definately finfing out. we are planners and want to know what colours to do the nursery, and what clothes to buy etc.. we dont want to end up having everything in neutral colours because it is a bit boring.

    I really think it is a boy, and DH is hopeful it is a boy. We have all girls in my family, so would be great, but we are happy with whatever comes along. I am just dying to find out!!!

  5. #5
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    May 2004

    I didn't find out with my first two, and it's a great surprise at the end, it adds to all the emotion. This one I did find out and I am happy I did. It make this pregnancy a little different than the other two.

    I can just imagine everyone when they find out I am having another girl... they'll all be like "Another girl!!". I am not looking forward to it!! I can imagine me telling them to stick it! It's bad enough that you wish for a sex and don't get it and then you have to put up with everyones comments! Oppps I'm going off on a bit of a tangent here.

    But yeah... happy I found out this time, it'll give me more preparation time, and I'll get more input in the name this time around


  6. #6
    BellyBelly Life Member

    Nov 2003

    Our thoughts on finding out seem to have changed with the number of pg's we've had. With the 1st pg we thought that we'd find out but tell everyone that we didn't know as everyone was saying 'oh you're not going to find out the sex are you?!'. 2nd pg we thought we'd find out and tell only a few people. This time I'm finding that after losing our other babies I don't actually care what people think of us finding out the sex. I want to know as much about this baby as possible and I'm not going to worry about trying to hide what gender the baby is from other people if we do get to find out.

  7. #7
    BellyBelly Member

    May 2004

    We found out with Nicholas that he was going to be a boy and whne I get pregnant with the next one we will definitley found out again too. As you have said, Ms it is a suprise no matter whether you find out or not.

  8. #8
    BellyBelly Member

    May 2004

    We found out with Kimberley and will ask again this time. Not really good at waiting. Last time we did not tell anyone well I did one close friend and that was it.

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Jan 2004

    I'm one who didn't want to find out, but when we went for our ultrasound, we had decided to find out. We arrived 20-30 mins late I think, after driving on a very bumpy highway, then they made me wait about another 20 mins. Since I was standing at the desk ready to ask for another appointment they didnt bother to ask me to change and the women only took a few minutes to do the u/s. So we never found out.

    I'm thinking of finding out next time. Not sure yet??


  10. #10
    BellyBelly Member

    Mar 2004

    We aren't finding out. Not for any real reason but we don't see any need to. The little one will be here soon and we will know then. It is nice to have a little surprise at the end. We aren't the sort to paint the nursery pink or blue, just nice neutral tones. I will be buying mostly jumpsuits for the little one to wear which are gender neutral. We shall just wait and see.

  11. #11
    Debbie Lee Guest

    I am in total agreeance with you Ms Lee! It is still a surprise no matter when you find out. I REALLY want to know but, my husband doesn't

    The hospital has a policy where if one doesn't want to find out, the other isn't allowed to know. I think it is a totally stupid policy!

    We just had our ultrasound today. I asked the sonographer if he would write it down on a piece of paper so that we could look at it on a special occasion and he refused. No reason given.

    I have to go for another ultrasound in a few weeks. I might try to go along without DH and ask them to tell me the sex. Surely if he is not there, they can't argue with me about finding out?? I can just tell a fib and say the father isn't in the picture. Neil will be none the wiser that I know and then I can "plan" my spending a little more around the sex (keeping it all a secret though!). Or do you think that is being too devious and dishonest with Neil? He was happy for me to find out and not tell him. It's just that the sonographer wasn't prepared for only one of us to know. Hmmm.....

    Otherwise, I guess I will just have to wait until the birth. As much as I would like to know, it's not a matter of life and death or anything. It's the first grandbaby on my side so the child is going to be spoiled rotten! I already have SO much bought for me. I will really only have to buy the pram and the car seat. I am sure clothes and stuff will be given to me after the birth and Neil has told me that some of the baby bonus can be for me to go on a gender-specific shopping spree.

    I am just not a patient person!

  12. #12
    BellyBelly Life Member

    Nov 2003

    Deb, I reckon that as Neil is okay with you knowing you should go for it LOL

  13. #13
    Ms Lee Guest

    Most of you are as impatient as me :smt081 . Good on you morv that patience will come in handy with a child.

    Hey bielee, I agree with angel if Neil doesn't mind then do it and if you do slip up and say he or she on the odd occasion then just purposefully say the other sex just as often, he won't know...hopefully!

  14. #14
    BellyBelly Member

    Nov 2003

    we dont want to find out the sex, but i was sooooo very tempted with joshua, when the offer is there it does sound so very tempting!


  15. #15

    You have to find out Lesley !! That way I know what pile of clothes to give you LMAO.

    Love :hbeat:

  16. #16
    Ex adm!n, quietly rusting....

    Feb 2004

    We were totally undecided, one week we wanted to find out the next we didn't!

    On the day of our u/s I asked Aaron what he thought & he said he'd leave it up to me. So we went in & almost straight away the sonographer asked if he could see anything did we want to know. I looked at Aaron & he shrugged, I said nah, yeah ok we want to know. The sonographer said, ok its a boy, there's his penis, there's his scrotum. I couldn't tell though After that we saw his bits about 4 or 5 times.

    In a way it's good for us cos MIL has plenty of time to get used to the idea - she wanted a girl.

  17. #17
    BellyBelly Member

    Sep 2004
    Sunshine coast, QLD

    I found out with my first that i was having a boy. I dont regret knowing as i am so impatient, i regret telling people. My hubby has a big mouth so this time around if i have the opportunity to find out i will but not tell anyone and say they couldnt see anything as yet. The reason i dont want to tell this time is that when everyone knew we were having a boy and then we had chosen a name beforehand it took all the suprise out of anyone being told when he was born, as they already knew everything about him.

  18. #18
    Breastfeeding mummy extraordinaire

    Sep 2004
    Sydney's Norwest

    I didn't find out with my first two. Not that I didn't want to, they just couldn't see. I found out at around 17 weeks with Noah that he was a boy and I found out at 19 weeks that this babe is a girl. I really needed to know with Noah and I'm sure that it helped me to accept that I was having another boy as I desperately wanted a girl. This time around I wanted to know but it was not a need. I truely thought that I was having a boy so we were pleasently surprised when it turned out to be a girl. This will give me plenty of time to buy all things girly

    Take care