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Thread: To find out sex or not....

  1. #1

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    Question To find out sex or not....

    Ok...I was just sitting here and realised that DH and I are still debating the pro's and cons of finding out the baby's sex. Problem is... scan is tomorrow at 12 and I just went OMG!!

    Did anyone find out and wish they hadn't...or didn't find out and wish they had???

    Main pro really is getting gender specific things I think. Anyone got some pro's and cons to throw in here?? I really need some help cos it's snuck up on me so fast that I'm doing my head in...lol.



  2. #2

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    We have always found out but never brought gender specific things until after the baby was born just in case they got it wrong. Even with having more than one scan we still didn't believe them 100%.

  3. #3

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    You can always get them to write it down and seal it in an envelope that way if you are still unsure tomorrow but want to know the next day you can find out

    I didn't want to know with Kameron but foudn out accidently and was happy that we did. We never told anybody though what we were having. We then found out with the other 2 boys and told everyone.

    Love

  4. #4

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    I cannot wait to find out for certain, although we have a fair idea after our scan yesterday

    I am a planner, and I cant help myself. There is not enough unisex things out there and I hate green and yellow lol.

    So for me its a big factor in narrowing down names, planning nursery design and clothes etc. Lets hope theyre right!

  5. #5

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    We didn't want to find out, then i did, then i didn't! What we did was ask the sonographer to write it down and we sealed it in an envelope. Both of us are really glad we didn't find out and we have no desire to open the envelope (for almost 2 weeks now its been burning a hole in a draw). Because they aren't 100% I wouldn't base what i purchased on it so we figured why bother. Now we are going to wait until after the birth then open the envelope to find out if they were right - a bit of fun really (and if we do change our mind it's there on a little piece of paper). I think by doing it this way we haven't rushed to any decisions to find out or not as it's there anytime we want it, no pressure. Really needs to be your decision though. I didn't want to find out and then regret it - i can't take that back. You need to be comfortable with your decision. Good luck.

  6. #6

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    omg you have such strength rachel!! I am way too curious there is no way it could sit there untouched! hehe

  7. #7

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    I thought it would be so hard and had actually prepared to give the envelope to my mum (it is an envelope that she can't peek in without me knowing), but it has been easy. Haven't even though about it really (until i come on here and everyone is talking about sex of baby!!). Just have to make it 19 more weeks!!!!

  8. #8

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    I didn't find out with any of my four! I liked having a bit of a surprise at the end. And there was no way I'd have the willpower to leave it alone if they'd written it down on a piece of paper. In fact, the sonographer stayed away from between the legs altogether with Charlie!

    BUT if I ever fell pg again, I'd find out. I think it's coz I don't think I could wait to find out if I was having a girl or yet another boy!

  9. #9

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    I want a surprise - let's face it, I know I'm going to birth the best baby in the whole wide world (mummies are allowed to be a little biased), so I may as well leave the gender as the only surprise I'm going to have: something to help me through the labour!

    DH did want to know to organise gender-specific gifts, but I pointed out that when the baby's coming out we're not going to be waving a train or a doll straight at it, and people can buy gifts after the baby's here if they want to do the blue/pink theme that much. They won't be seeing us for the first week so they have lots of time to buy whatever they want and be as gender-specific as they like!

    Clothes are the one area where I've been tempted, but most stuff I like is for three months or older, so I'll know the gender by then! I have stuff knitted in yellow and white, but the stuff I've bought has been in funky cream, brown and orange, so you're not stuck with just yellow and green. Even lime green is funky and better than the grass-green you usually see, so there's lots of variance in the shades of things you can buy.

  10. #10
    mum5boys Guest

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    I never found out with my 5 boys as I thought it would be nice to have a surprise but I was tempted with the last one but DH talked me out of it so we never found out until he was born.
    I would love to find out this time but DH still doesn't want to know and I can't find out and keep it from him.We both have to want to know or we don't find out until its born.
    Cass Good luck with your decision and all the best for your scan tomorrow, I can't wait to hear how it goe's. I will try and find out before I leave tomorrow night.
    Take care
    Michelle

  11. #11

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    Quote Originally Posted by Astrolady View Post
    You can always get them to write it down and seal it in an envelope that way if you are still unsure tomorrow but want to know the next day you can find out

    I didn't want to know with Kameron but foudn out accidently and was happy that we did. We never told anybody though what we were having. We then found out with the other 2 boys and told everyone.
    Yes, I could do that but unlike Rachel...I would have no chance of that envelope remaining unopened even to this weekend..rofl.

    If I found out accidentally then to me the decision was kinda made by fate IYKWIM? As I said to DH...bubs might be rude like Ryn's and show us his/her butt...lol...or be modest (although don't like the chances with DH for the father - yes I said that to him and he laughed) and have his/her legs crossed.

    This is soooo hard...I was talking to DH this arvo and I think part of what is making it so hard is that we haven't had any scans before this one..so as I put it to him - it's kinda like being in labour and seeing for the first time if that makes sense?? I think if I'd had an earlier scan and already seen bubs then I probably wouldn't be wrestling with this so bad.

    Thanks for your input - I will go and think about this more no doubt...lol

    Michelle, I will try to post what happens in the afternoon so you can get a chance to read before you go on your lovely holiday

  12. #12

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    Cass, we didnt' find out at all with DD. We had one scan at 19wks and that was it. We had a beautiful surprise at the end of a very LONG labour.

    With DS I ended up having 3 scans - 13wks, 19wks and 33wks. We didn't find out at the first two scans, but by 33wks we were still no closer with finding a boys name so we ummed and ahhed and eventually decided to find out so we could make the name game easier. It was amazing to know that whoever it was growing inside of me was actually a boy. We both just melted and it didn't spoil a thing. It made the bonding experience even greater. We didn't tell anyone, and I even bought a few pink things (I left the tags on) just in case they were wrong; but they weren't. We didn't regret finding out for a moment and for me, it was nice to only find out so late in the piece. I'd do the same again next time if I can.

    Good luck with your decision making.

  13. #13

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    We didnt find out the sex of our baby. We wanted to have a surprise when it was born. DH does think it is a girl, however, we didnt ask the sonographer to look so we dont actually know for sure. This is our first baby. Also, the sex of the baby is not particularly important to us. All we want is a healthy baby, and we dont have a preference on the sex.

  14. #14
    4mumnbub Guest

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    never really thought about the gender. but we did plan for names just in case. so we prepared one for a boy and one for a girl. but then when the doctor tells you the sex, you will become very happy and excited

  15. #15

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    I found out with our first - and LOVED it. I knew she was my little girl, and we called her by name, etc. With my second, they couldn't tell us. (she was way too modest. ) It bothered me the whole time. Some women really like to have the surprise at the end, but I found that I was in a much better mood for a surprise after my U/S than after labour. All I cared about then was that she was OUT!!! It didn't really matter what she was, so long as I didn't have to push anymore! We didn't buy anything pink when we knew, just in case they were wrong, and we didn't tell anyone else that we knew.
    I really liked it that way, but it certainly is a personal decision. Over here, by the way, they don't tell you at the U/S, they write it on the report to the OB, and he or she asks if you want to know. So you have another chance at every drs visit.
    All the best with your U/S!

  16. #16

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    Good luck today, I can't wait to hear what you decided.

    We are finding out for sure (if Squirt cooperates, that is!), I hate surprises and am also an organsational freak. Also, I'm sick of people saying "Ohh it's definitely a (insert gender here)" (especially my MIL). How the hell do they know? I won't be going out buying gender specific clothing until after the baby is born though, I might buy a couple of things gender related, but not too over the top. Nothing is 100%!

  17. #17

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    If you click on my name in my signature you will get to see pics of my belly and my BUBS!!

    We weren't decided 100% to find out or not so we just told the lady that if we saw we did and if we didn't we didn't. Andy thinks he saw boy bits...I am unsure but didn't want to ask her in case Andy didn't want her to answer...lol. She said if we asked her to confirm she would. So, we don't know, but I kinda wish I had asked, but it's cool. Bubs is going really well and she was very happy with what she saw. Also bubs was very well behaved and only turned over near the end...put his/her back to us and I said...doesn't wanna play no more...lol. He/she was waving arms around a bit and it was all sooooo cute Everything is where it's supposed to be and also measuring exactly spot on to the day with my EDD.

    Fletch & Ash...I hear you on the control freak thing...me too but I'm going to have to live with this one...lol.

  18. #18

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    what a beautiful baby you have there

    Your tummy hasnt grown much! good on ya

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