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Thread: Have you regretted having more??

  1. #37

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    That is a good point about having someone else to play with if your fighting with the other. Also about your kids as adults. I have never looked into the future that way. I have often thought about what kind of adults they will be & what type of work they will be in. Evan I see as a computer tech of some sort with an interest in music. But more in the way of creating/writing music with the computers being involved in someway.
    Glenn I actually see as a nurse, also involved in music, but in the loud, banging type-Drums maybe lol. Glenn is going to be a little beefhead type I think. Does anyone watch ER? You know the guy on that show who I think he is a nurse type guy, but he is a big fellow. Thats Glenn. Thats how I see him, A gentle giant of sorts I guess. Its funny actually these are things I have had a "feeling" about from when they were babies. Its not something I have just made up for them, its what I see for them in my minds eye IYKWIM. I oculd be wrong, I could be right. But what I do know for sure is that what ever my children decide to do in life they will have the support & encouragement to achive there dreams.

    Kerrie maybe the best thing to do is to sit back & see what life dishes out for you. Don't overly actively TTC#3, but don't do anything to prevent it either. I know it would be hard to just sit back & let it happen if thats what is meant to be. BUT give it a go for a few months & if you find that you are still paying alot of attention to your cycles & second guessing if & when you O's & you DTD etc, then I think its a pretty clear that you want a third. Tell DH the same thing. "lets just see what happens" If he is also still bring it up in a few months then I think you can both rest assure that its what you want.
    As for being able to cope with 3 on your own the most of the time. You know what, have you seen/heard the slogan "I make milk, whats your super power?" ? I think a more appropriate one is "I am a mother, whats your super power?". We can do anything, why would you ever doubt that you can't?

    Last edited by *Efjay*; October 2nd, 2006 at 10:57 PM.

  2. #38

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    Melanie - I will be 35 soon and I am STILL trying to achieve a successful pregnancy with a take home baby at the end. However, despite this challenge, I would love to have three children. I have no idea why but it is something I would love and even though I am getting older, I still believe this could be a possiblility. I would be nearly 36 around the next birth if I conceive soon and would be happy to have others as long as I am through by the age of 40. Of course, nothing is guarenteed but you have to have hope to get through.

    DH is one of 3 (was 4 but No 2 died at age 5) and they all get along well. Better as they get older!! So he is happy no matter how many we have.

  3. #39

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    I am STILL trying to achieve a successful pregnancy with a take home baby at the end
    Awwwww I love the way you worded that.

  4. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by poppet View Post
    I cant imagine lying in bed at night and regretting #3 child (if it happens). I would hope no one would ever 'regret' their children.
    This is exactly why we are takeing the time to make a decision that we wont regret, we dont regret the kids we have now and doubt that if we went again that we would regret it. I just like to be sure in my head.

    I think its more a case of not liking the situation your in, rather than the child itself.
    I totally agree you with you here, it wouldnt be the childs fault but the child would cop the negative reactions i suppose. Its the same when a child is totally out of control or rude, you dislike that child, but its not the childs fault, its the parent. Kwim

    Why dont you get a dog, or plan a big holiday for the 4 of you? SOrry, i dont mean to sound harsh, but i kinda agree with Fionajill. The whole fact thats its a hard decsion for you should maybe see you and DH compiling a list of positives and negatives??
    The pos and negs are always going through my mind everyday and i can honeslty say there are few negs.

    I used to ask parents with children close together 'ohhh, how do you do it?'. I remember one lady replied 'you just do, you dont have a choice really'.
    Well to this i say, 'i do have a choice thats why im not rushing into it'.

    YOu cant sit in a corner and scream i cant do this anymore. As adults we need to be there for our children all the time. Thats how i see it anyway. I would prob ask yourselves what you feel another child would bring to your family?
    Good luck hon, with whatever you decide....
    I certainly dont sit in a corner now and scream and as an adult i am always there for my kids, how ever many we have. Another child would only bring more joy into our perfect family, BUT as ive said before my concern is for the kids we already have. I listen to them and even though they are so young they have a little bit of a say in this. They are involved and have the right to have an opinion. If that makes sense.

    Thanks heaps for your input, i love hearing different opinions. Gives me more to think about to.

    Fiona, i feel you wont be happy till we are pg with #3 . I said to DH this morning one more would be nice, he kept saying no but with a smile. I wouldnt be surprised if we go again because we are leaning more towards it but we still have to be sure. Im hopeless i know but i dont take things like this very lightly. He is still keen for the kids to grow up so we can do stuff with them, which i can understand. But seeing him on the bed yesterday with the 2 kids i could envisage (s) another mucking about with him. Not sure if its cause im one of 3 or the fact that i just love our kids to death and feel another will complete us.

    Thanks again girls for all your input, you are ALL so supportive of one another regardless of the out come and i think thats great.

  5. #41
    Fire Fly Guest

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    Caro, i would like another because our kids are such a joy to have and i have time to make another (just) and i dont want to miss out, Lol or regret not going again. I adore our kids. They are both good kids and i enjoy being there mum and im greatfull that i have them.
    We went through the same indecision with #2 but not this bad. I probably am hesitant because of DH but thats only because i dont want him to agree to something he isnt comfortable with either.

  6. #42

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    I have 3 children-3yrs, 18months and 4 months. I find it VERY hard most days, as DH works a lot, and im new to melbourne, but i love my children, the only think i regret is having them so close together (20 months between #1 and 2, and 14 months between #2 and 3) It would have been nice to have them a little further apart and be able to enjoy them a bit. But we were lucky we already we hard a car that would accomodate the 3 carseats, and we moved the boys into a room together. We already had all the furniture we needed. I thjink you have already decided what you want... but you need to tell people "yes, im having a third", dont let people tell you you want it. Good luck!!
    Last edited by simone; October 3rd, 2006 at 04:32 PM. Reason: chop 'n' change

  7. #43

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    Don't regret a second of any minute of any day.

    Best of luck,
    Debbie

  8. #44

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    Funny, I have noticed a couple others of you felt the same as I did after having #2 (#4 if you count my twins). As soon as Chloe was born I just knew I wanted another one. When I had my 6 week check up my GP was quite shocked that I was already planning another one and asking the best time to try. She said she hardly ever had women saying they were planning more at their 6 week check! We waited 9 months and I fell pregnant first time trying. (Wish I could do the same now!!!).

    Best wishes again,
    Debbie

  9. #45
    Fire Fly Guest

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    Thanks Simone, the age gap between mine is DD and DS are 3yrs 9mths apart which is a great gap i think, for me anyway. But if we fell now the gap between DS and NB would be closer. We too have a car that will accommodate 3 chairs and we have all the furniture, even clothes for both sex so couldnt be more simpler really now i come to think about it. The bedrooms, well one would have to share as we are only building 2 kids rooms in the shed, there is room to add another actually so thats not a prob either.

    Yeah i do think ive made the decision im just to scared to go with it. I still find it interesting to hear other peoples opinions.

    Maybe i should just do Fionas suggestion and not think so hard of when i 'O', which is hard cause i get the pain (like now) of when i do 'O'. So that wont work either. Lol.

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