Ok girls, a bit of a question for you, having a little DH dilemma at the moment. Regarding the labour & post-birth.

I don't want to be telling anyone other than DH & my parents when I go into labour, they need to be there of course but I don't want other people calling or "popping in" to the hospital while I'm in labour, or ringing becasue they think it's been long enough and we should be telling them the news. I also don't want anyone visiting us on the first day post-birth either, I want time to rest up, recover and bond with our baby privately, and to attempt to establish BF before the hordes arrive. I want to stipulate to DH when he sends the arrival text message to tell people "visitors welcome from tomorrow".


This is my dilemma, my DH does not see the "big deal" about either (of course he doesn't, it's not him going through it all!) things have changed a lot in the last 27 years since his son was born and he just doesn't get how it's done now. He thinks it would be quite normal to have a waiting room full of people while I'm in delivering and to have visitors straight away after the birth and wouldn't see the big deal in a stack of people sitting there watching me trying to establish BF (which for me IS a big deal, I can't do any new things with people watching me, let alone this. When I'm learning I have to be left on my own and discover it my own way)


He also has a REALLY bad habit of refusing to "be told" i.e. if I say to do things a certain way, then that's the last thing he will do, he will go as out of his way as he has to to prove the point. Especially if he doesn't understand or agree with my reasons why.


He also refuses to discuss the matters now as it's "too early" or even ahead of time at all, and just fobs me off with "we'll see what happens on the day" which translates into "I'll wait til you're in labour and can't do anything about it and just go ahead and do it my way".


So I really don't know how I'm going to get around all this and make him respect my wishes. Any suggestions? Grub did they cover this one at the NPH antenatal classes? I think if the suggestions came from a professional he might listen.