Hi,

I read this yesterday and wasn't able to post straight away (stupid internet) but wanted to come back and tell you that I could have written that post myself a few months ago. We TTC'd for 3 years and had to go through IVF/ICSI to conceive DS.

When I was about 20 weeks pregnant, a friend announced her pregnancy after only TTC for 2 months. I was devastated, angry and resentful that it was so easy for her, and even though I was pregnant myself. But I recognised that it was my baggage, not her's. I was also happy for her that she had conceived, but it didn't stop the anger and hurt and sadness of what I had been through. I think her story felt like a slap in the face for what we had endured, and it almost felt like she'd done it to make me feel bad (I should add, she was actually very sensitive and considerate toward me at this time, so she wasn't flaunting the pregnancy or anything).

What's more, I also had a similar experience to what you're going through now - I had on-and-off spotting for the first 12 weeks of my pregnancy, and was very anxious for a long time. It was very hard to be happy about being pregnant when I was convinced that I was going to miscarry. It didn't occur to me that I would make it to full term, or walk away with a baby. I did have a lot of counselling, but I think the journey of LTTTC stays with us and becomes part of our make-up.

Be kind to yourself, what you're experiencing is normal. There will be a day when you can enjoy your pregnancy, and hopefully heal from the journey you've travelled.

All the best hun.